How to love


When a child is born and grows to become an adult he or she would explore life adventures in many ways up until he or she on the hunting expedition looking for a soul mate.

There are many hunters that were savaged by lions and leopards along the way while looking for the springboks. Those who escaped wolves, lions, and leopards are still nursing their unhealed wounds.

It’s quite difficult to notice a lion when it’s wearing a sheep skin. You would welcome it in your heart, soul, and mind while it intends to strike you down unexpectedly.

There are some lucky people who got what they were looking for during hunting, I congratulate them they should keep the light shining as always, even in heaven and I believe even death won’t have the power to do them apart.

I encourage love in the hearts and I will be consoling those who were hurt in their relationship to regain their strength to fall in love again. People get injured at the wars not in their relationships.

I write about love relationship between a man and woman. I am aware of another relationships existing in the world, I’m not discriminating them, but I write about a relationship I know and currently maintaining with my husband.

I write about what I and my husband believing in when comes to relationship. I hope our relationship thoughts and adventures would be instrumental to your relationship as well. I urge your participation as well to make this site instrumental to everyone.

How to love?

Excavating machine in the name of love:

I always associate love as an excavating machine, it digs up rocky land to make it smooth and even for you to move with an ease. It’s all begins when love is trusted among two hearts in the relationship.

Trusted love works hard for the benefits that would be reaped by a man and woman in love. When untrusted love inhabits your hearts it becomes weak and unable to work for the best results required in the relationship.

See-through hearts without furtive motives make love a soldier that fights against all odds posed by life.

Chapter 1.

Love is a soldier on duty:

Love is fraught of many hiccups and challenges, but when you love each honestly, it easy to deal with those setbacks. Base of your relationship should be solid and firm to stand the test of time. Let love alone to work for the benefits that should be earned by both partners in love.

Trusted love is a soldier on duty and it carries necessary ammunition to fight with any challenges along the way. Laying solid foundation of love is achieved by togetherness between a man and woman in love.

Togetherness is resulted from respect and ability to listen your partner. Outside world is always competing about who is superior and smart than anyone.

Competition at work among the managers and supervisors will always be fierce because their relationship is money and positions.

Friends are always competing the way they wear, cars they drive, and house they live in. Love relationship is a different environment and your approach to one another changes dramatically.

Love relationship commands its own level of traits and responsibilities that are different from any other relationships. One needs to get ready to enter a sacred space with no friends competition found in a friendship relationship.

Friendship within love precincts it gets rid of gossips and betrayals. Your love need to grow, if a partner talk behind his or her partner’s back or gossiping to one another, such love is nothing but a sham.

In love you don’t do what the world does. Love relationship is sacred space and it should be a heaven for both of you to live in and forget about the world complexities.

World is a separate place from heaven. Gossiping, betrayals, envy, enmity etc. are worldly traits that do not have room in your heaven of love and marriage.

Chapter 2.

How is your garden?:

Love, like a small plant, it must be watered. Our tongues are the watering can to water a plant called love. Our words of mouth we utter are like gardening equipment to remove alien weeds that always want overshadow your sweet relationship you have with your wife or girlfriend.

Some people find it difficult to say those cool, sweet words when are due because of certain insecurities they possess. Complimenting how beautiful or handsome your partner is everyday won’t imply that praised partner would be boastful and despise you afterwards.

Some people have some insecurity that if they complement their partners, they would become Gods over them and become insolent.

I believe you chose your partner to be your wife or husband because you loved him or her at the first time you met, he or she deserve that compliment every day.

Empty watering cans in our mouths should be refilled with clean and purified water to continue irrigating our plant love lest become withered and shrivelled when there is no water sprinkles over it.

Harsh words from a dry watering can in our mouth weakens love to become frail. Our words are like a spade and fork to remove weeds that eager to crowd plant love. Such equipment should be used for the good purpose not to cut one another.

Precautionary measure to use forks and spades around plant love should be taken lest damage it and become cut into pieces. Lioness teeth are sharp as needle but are able to carry a cub unhurt.

Our words are also sharp as fork and spade, but if are used for good purpose around fragile plant love they can be instrumental towards growth of tender love.

Weeds of love is disrespect, impertinent, superiority, jealousy etc. gardeners of love should notice such scenario and use relevant amenities to remove such dirt to ensure love is growing healthy and strong.

Chapter 3.

Love without problems:

It is possible to create an environment in your relationship where there are no problems. Being crossed and angry is human but how can you hold grudges against somebody you chose from the many and vouched in your heart that you love him or her.

Bible stipulates that in your anger do not sin and do not let the sun go down while you are still angry. There are some couples who don’t talk to each for the couples of days cannot confide to one another.

Animosity, hatred, and anger are the names that do not appear on the love vocabulary.  Love commands atmosphere of warmth and happiness in your relationship.

Losing weight of the couples in the relationship should be the results of gym exercise to maintain healthy living standards not due to relationship complexities.

Listening will always a good skill when communicating to one another. Time you allocate yourself to listen to your partner point of views signifies maturity and understanding what meant by love in your relationship.

Telling approach signify being bossy over your partner and such love is nothing but a sham. Healthy love relationship encourages two way communications and listening skills.

The words that says, ‘I am a man everything I say goes’ they became redundant over the yester years because they were spoken by the primitive and barbaric people.

Discerning men out there who understand what love relationship is, they shun away from such words because they are infectious virus to kill your relationship gradually.

Man significance is not shown by his stern words and commandments over his woman. Man is a leader to lead and create sweet atmosphere of love in his house. Woman ability to multi-task adds flavour in the house when love is reflected from the head of the house, firstly.

Chapter 4.

Space ship love:

It takes two to tango in the relationship. I just want to draw your attention to the space ship. When a space ship ignites itself from the ground it rises up to the air.

When a space ship sky rocketing an air becomes thinner and finally void. The emptiness of air it means an aircraft is on the other side of an atmosphere with no force of gravity.

Outside our atmosphere it is very hot in such a way that tiles covering an air space become melt.

Astronaut uses effective computer system to detect any tiles that tend to melt away due to a scorching environment out there.

An astronaut would put on, a relevant heat resistant gear to replace a melted tile with a new one to continue with a safe journey.

If a melted tile is ignored a hole would appear and heat would get inside to blow up an air space.

When a tile in your relationship start to melt you should attend to it immediately lest blow up your relationship. Your relationship should have an effective system to detect any faults that start to present themselves and dealt with accordingly.

You are the astronauts of this relationship, and this space ship should float and cruise smoothly without any faults. When a tile start to melt a helping hand from your partner will be always required to patch it up and trod on with your lovely journey.

It’s worrying and sad if an air space blows up along the way because stars and galaxies are beautiful to explore out there. In your relationship you should watch the stars of all colours.

There are beautiful rainbows you should see in your relationship. Life is too short for this space ship to blow up, patch it up to glide with Venus, Sirius and Canopus.

Beautiful galaxies in your relationship, are to have children and become happy when they are graduating at the universities.

Nice rainbow in your relationship, is your house and cars you own. Sparkling Venus and Sirius is taking a holiday vacation to the beautiful world landscapes, rivers and seas.

Shiny Canopus is when you live happy and enjoy your relationship each an every step of the way.

Chapter 5.

Take a look at yourselves:

God created a human being to be beautiful and handsome. Eyes, ears, mouth and legs were created and fixed into our bodies to entertains and keep our bodies happy.

When you become married you become on flesh and soul. When one of the organs of your body is not satiated the whole body get disappointed.

Are your eyes still impressed by your partner in front of you as you first met him or her. Do your ears still capable to hear those sweet words from your partner?

Do your feet still walks towards your wife or husband? When you knock off from work do your feet walks you to home or they walks you to see somebody whom you cheat with.

When you are married you become one flesh to enjoy your bodily plugins that were inserted by God in your bodies.

It is vital important to search our bodily plugins organs together and fix those which are becoming redundant. Update those bodily organs to work good results for your bodies.

If your eyes are impressed by another woman other than your wife, it means your plugin eyes need to be worked on. Is your plugin mouth still utter those romantic words to your partner? If your plugin mouth utter bad words your relationship is at stake, you need to update your mouth plugin accordingly.

Does your mind content includes high volume of romantic and sweet words? If your mind contains none of those sweet words therefore you need to update it immediately.

Sit down and scrutinize each part of your bodies if they still ecstatic in your relationship. God created life to be enjoyed through our body parts.

Eyes see beautiful landscapes and seas, Ears hears sweet music and the sounds of the birds, mouth become happy if it tastes good foods with flavours that entices your tongue buds, hands build nice houses and cars and legs carries us to wherever we want to go.

Your eyes should see your partner, your mouth should praise how beautiful your partner is, your arms should hold your partner fondly, your lips should kiss your wife or husband, Your mind should think of your wife or husband every day, Your feet should walks you towards your partner, your heart should always treasure your partner.

Sex organs are the one of the features that entice a body a great deal therefore it is important talk and peruse your bodily organs to see if they are still satiated in your relationship.

Chapter 6.

Romantic culture:

I am a Zulu woman that was born and bred in the rural areas. Growing up in the remote areas of Msinga in South Africa has told me many things that were transpiring around me.

I learnt a lot about being a virgin up until you get married of which is helpful during these times of various perilous diseases that are transmitted through sexual intercourse.

I learnt about all aspects of Zulu culture marriages and how to maintain such wedlock with respect and determination. Zulu women are known of being grounded and respectful. Zulu men are known of loving their female partners and support their families one way or the other.

Love among many homestead in my area is shown when a man of the house go to the cities of South Africa to look for jobs to support his family. Most of women I saw when I was growing up were the domestic wives.

Waiting for their husbands to return home after a year of toiling in the mines would bring joy to everyone at home when the husband and the father come back home.

Children and wife become happy to see the father who hardly come home. It’s sad when such husband and father have to return back to the city and left his wife and children behind, tears are welling up their eyes when they bid each other farewell.

Our culture is centred on complete respect in such a way that some of the good love patterns are treated as dire breach of certain Zulu values.

In my area when a man of his house is heading to the city once his annual holidays are over, his family would accompany him to the bus station.

When a bus approaching, it would take a great deal of himself to kiss his wife among other standby commuters and his children because of those treasured values.

I spent a good quality time in my area and I grew up to become a complete woman, then I started to explore more life other than in my area. I started visiting big cities of South Africa to pursue my studies and looking for jobs.

I discovered many interesting habits and customs that are done by another people of different cultures.

One day I visited Durban and I was resting under a tree shade in the park. I then saw two white well advanced couple holding hands and walk each other to their car. A man opened a passenger door and ushered his wife inside a car.

I was captivated by their relationship that all these years are still keeping the light shining despite age. I learnt that love goes a long way with another cultures and the lamp that shines at their home is displayed in the public without a shame.

I am a person who notices a great deal. It’s common to see people losing interest at each other when they are growing in their relationship of love especially with my own culture.

I am not racist but I conduct my own statistics by observing and noticing love patterns in all walks of life. I go out to the parks, malls, and any other public places to see how love partners treat each other.

I have been noticing a black couple when heading into their car, a man would open his car door and rest himself inside while his woman is struggling to open a passenger door car by herself while carrying heavy parcels.

Well advanced couples they sleep separately with no kisses and holding. We should not allow such long distance relationship at home and everywhere.

I have been reading a bible that when Adam was away a snake deceived Eva. When you allow distance between the two of you an opportunistic evil can happen. When you got married you sworn to love each other until death do you apart yet you don’t sleep together.

Food we eat can have expiry date but love matures when we grow old together. When you grow old its where the body start to feel week and frail but loving hand would support each other with love.

Love partners who doesn’t talk to each other for a week they allow a gap between them for that snake of Eva in the bible to take an advantage of the situation and destroy your relationship.

Life is too short for hatred to one another in the relationship. I always ask myself how can you get upset with someone you love?

I mean you chose your partner out of the many people and vouched in your heart to love and cherished her in your heart, its awkward that you don’t talk to each for days, my question is, are you still maintaining the feeling of love or feeling of enmity.

There is no marriage for hatred people, when you angry each other you maintain enmity relationship which doesn’t have room in the love and romantic relationship.

Chapter 7.

Love versus lust:

It’s over the weekend you put on your red dress and wear a sweet perfume on your body. You pick up your handbag and head up to town.

You get off from your car and trod on to the shopping centres, wading your way through the throngs of people and suddenly a gentleman with a sweet voice greets you.

You look at him and you can see love in his eyes, he is impressed by your looks and sweet talks from your smooth mouth. He then asks to meet you again at the coffee shop on the specific date.

You go home ecstatic, can’t get over his smile and cool tone of his voice.

Many thoughts come flashing your mind if he is really the love of your life or he is just another dog that eager to savage you with its fangs and get away.

This is a difficult part of a woman to determine a man’s advances whether are for real or not. You are single and his handsomeness makes your heart skip a bit.

You meet him at the coffee shop as planned and he tells you how much he loves you. Your heart melts away and you welcome him in your life.

He invites you to his house, he lays you down and entertains himself, he then disappears into thin air afterwards. It’s evident that lust took over and blurs his heart feelings.

Lust loves 50% and hates 100%. 2 Samuel 13 writes about a man called Amnon who loved a lady called Tamar. Amnon’s love was nothing but lust as he planned to rape Tamar. When Amnon finished rapping Tamar he hated her a great deal.

Lust is prominent when your partner doesn’t point at you in the daylight and vouched that this is my woman or man. Lust waits until the sun sets and it leads you to bed only.

There are many people who were admitted in the hospital in the name of love but lust took over to transmit fatal diseases.

Lust is a big enemy of love, it takes an advantage of the woman’s soft spot to believe easily what is told by the word of mouth spoken by the man who makes some void advances.

Lust is a syndrome of early divorce and break ups. 99% of people in the world need love but only 1% has a true love. Such 99% of people includes conditional love because of bigger financial muscle, cars, level of education ect.

True love is depicted when your partner is proud and confident to point your whereabouts amidst crowds of people. True love stays the same it doesn’t change.

Chapter 8.

Let’s avoid abusive relationship:

I always say love is like a golden hen that comes with silver chicks. Love packages all beautiful elements entirely without any adversities.

Abusive relationship is when a partner in love mistreats another fellow partner and love becomes null and void.

Harsh words might be not prickle your physical body but when uttered they destroy a character or dignity ones feel as a partner in love relationship.

I always say it’s better to come down with a physical disease than emotional demise. A physician can find it easy to heal physical illness but when hurt emotional he can’t offer any assistance.

There are many factors that could contribute on abusive relationship.

Consumption of intoxicating substances such as drugs and alcohol can change ones thinking method to utter abusive words and sometimes beatings.

Such situation requires an immediate intervention to halts it on the onset by referring such individual to rehabilitation services.

Work stress can be a contributing factor towards abusive relationship.

It is vital important to plan your work in line with objectives of your company, people who plan in life they are hardly get stressed or depressed because any stress can cause perilous situation at home, especially in your relationship. Work stress can be severe when you live unhappy at home.

Onus is upon the love partners to create a warm love relationship at home that would eradicate any outside stress to wake up refreshed next morning to deal with new challenges.

Happy partners in love they create their heaven together at home and anywhere else. Unhappy partners in love they might as well create hell for them to roast alive.

Financial issues in the relationship can be the source of noise and sadness. Needs and wants should be met within your financial muscle, overstretching yourselves to procure anything that cost arm and leg to impress neighbors can leave a family destitute and noise would erupt.

Despising your partner because he or she earns less than you, doesn’t symbolize unconditional love that should cohabit your heaven of love.

Supporting your partner who doesn’t have any source of income should be accompanied by super love. It’s very hard to swallow food coupled with harsh words, no matter how nice that food is but it becomes swords to tear your throat opened.

Revealing your secretes shared between the two of you to your colleagues at work or friends is symptoms of calamity of relationship and it would definitely evoke your partner’s emotions negatively to become stressful and abusive.

Telling your friends how your partner gets under your skin when he or she is snoring at night, might be the joke of the day but would taste bad in your partner’s ears when he or she gets to know about it.

Chapter 9.

 Aiming for the perfect love in your relationship:

Maintaining healthy love in your relations is easy and possible. Your wife in front of your eyes is not just any person, she is your darling. Your husband that is before your eyes is not just any person, he is your sweetheart therefore love atmosphere between the two of you should speak volume very high.

Love is like a black coffee, still have to put sugar and milk to taste good on your tongue. A black coffee without sugar and milk is dull.
Sugar in your coffee is telling your partner how much you love her or him every day.

Milk in your coffee, is kissing your partner every day. Sugar in your coffee would be shown when you protect your partner and support him or her through thick and thin. Milk in your coffee is to work hand in hand when performing chores at home.

Sugar in your coffee, would be sweetened when you compliment your husband if he respects you and come home as always, wondering how many men who sleep out without their female partners’ knowledge.

Milk in your coffee is when you compliment your husband if he managed to buy any necessities required at home, such appraisal is due give it, you may wonder how much your appraisal can encourage your husband to continue doing good for the family.

Sugar in your coffee would be reflected when you fasten your wife’s shoe laces when she is pregnant, I can’t imagine difficulties when she tries to bend over on herself when her man doesn’t care.

Milk in your coffee, is shown when you call your husband at work and tell how much you miss him and tell him about nice food you prepared for him once he gets home after work. Sweetness of sugar in your coffee is kissing and hug your wife in the door step when you arrive at home after work.

If such ingredients are not well in your coffee relationship, a man would come home to shout and scold everyone at home. You can blow your own trumpet to say you are the head of the house and everyone should be quivering and scared when you around the truth is, your relationship is very far away from the definition of love.

Sugar in your coffee would exist in your relationship once you become humbled and respect your husband one way or the other. Man’s heart melts by respect from his wife and he would reciprocate by means of protection, caring, and responsible towards his wife.

Milk in your coffee should appear when you don’t judge each other by the previous unsuccessful relationships, love always refresh itself to climb up the peak of mountain, to reach the summit, and dwell without descending, when given another chance to live again.

Chapter 10.

Trust in the relationship:

Trust is one of the ingredients to a successful relationship. The question is do you trust your wife or husband. If your relationship lacks trust, it’s like a cavity in your tooth that aims to rot your relationship gradually.

Showing your fellow partner indications that you don’t trust him or her cause the heart to tear apart and it takes a great deal to mend it.

It is very common to ask those suspicious questions when your partner couldn’t pick up your call during evening when maintaining long distance relationship.

You would run haywire over nothing whereas your partner is bathing while charging his or her mobile. When your partner picks up your call, a can of worms opens that would left her or him heartbroken.

When busy shouting at each other, good atmosphere in your relationship becomes very gloom.

Trust between partners nourishes love to blossom bright in colours.

Insecurities are the syndrome of calamity of trust in your relationship and stereotyped minds make imaginations to be true.

When your wife comes late at home from her work, one of the days, think other causes that would be a contributing factor, it should be a road traffic, delayed trains or bus.

Questions like, ‘Where have you been? Are you starting to cheat on me now?’ can depict lack of your manhood confidence.

A gentleman who trusts himself doesn’t dare to ask those questions that show dire insecurities.

Trust is built by listening skill. When your partner explains reasons behind such unusual behaviours he or she done without intentions, jump a gun and shoot harsh words is uncalled for, when your partner goes to bed bleeding of those bullets in her heart.

Persuading her or him to forgiving you once your anger subsides, would turn out to be nasty when she turns her or his back towards you during evening.

Controlling anger is a part and parcel of maturity in your relationship, because it very hard to come to terms with words you said out of anger once you reconciled each other.

You can forgive each other but those harsh words they are hardly get erased in the mind of your partner.

Healthy relationship makes a partner to be the confidant of the other one. Love comprises of many secretes that should be shared between the two hearts involved.

Your dreams, hopes, visions and exploration remains in the diaries of your hearts, divulging those secretes to anyone other than your partner is unnecessary.

Bedroom talks are your valuable information that should rest under your bed cushions. These secretes shouldn’t be a topic among your colleagues in the office or friends around canteens.

We always get warned about the third person that should be avoided at all cost in the relationship to avoid unnecessary interference, because the third person can be detrimental to your relationship, when he or she is given an opportunity to vent his thoughts as to how your relationship should be handled.

Men do talk about love making when they are together. I don’t recommend such topics because anyone who is listening can stab you in the back and run after your partner afterwards.

It is very common to hear such stories that somebody else’s wife was cheating with his friend, it’s because men compliment their wives in front of their friends as to how they satisfying them when making love.

Ladies as well, would compliment their men in front of other ladies at work or at the saloons. When your friend is starting to run after your man, a relationship becomes sour.

Spare those words until evening, say them when you are undressing each other, say those words when kissing, and caressing each other fondly. Those words are special only for your hearts in love.

Chapter 11.

Love existence:

Many people nowadays they believe that power of love has been diminished. I have heard some men and women saying that they have given up on love because it’s something that is redundant in the hearts of the many.

These people are talking from experience, they wail over their relationship that could not work out. Hearts of these people were left tattered with very scarce hopes to mend.

When I listen closely to young women’s complaints, they wail about their boyfriends who came as hyenas that wear a sheep’s skin. They would go on to say that on the onset their relationship was going smooth up until they fell pregnant.

They said that their pregnancies brought menace in their relationship. Other woman I spoke with said her boyfriend disappeared into a thin air after she fell pregnant with his baby.

I always say a fool take lessons from his or her mistakes but wise person learns from other people’s mistakes. I have seen many young school girls becoming pregnant, now its raises some questions that is it the results of love or teenage lusts, no! It’s not love but its lusts.

I always say that lust leave people crying because of its consequences afterwards. True love doesn’t run away when any woman become pregnant, it’s always there all the time, it’s also doesn’t have some conditions.

It very important to wait until you are able to differentiate between love and lusts. Once you are familiar with characteristics of love and lust, you won’t be hurt by any men out there.

To kill a chicken you would have to throw grains of maize on the floor then it would come near and catch it while still eating.

Once a man throws a grain of love into your ears, you should scrutinize such grains on all sides and find motives behind those abundance of grains supplies.

Almost 99 percent of men out there, make some advance to their female counterpart out of sexual motives that rule their minds. 1 percent of men approach women out of genuine love.

If a person tells you that he loves you, ask him what he understands about love. If I say yes to your advances, what does that mean, what such love entails?

What should I give and what you would reciprocate in return because love is all about give and take. I mean your presence in my life should be beneficial in terms the way I think, speak and behave.

When we build a ship of love, I should bring along nails and hummers, my male partner should also bring along measuring tapes, screws driver, and planks. We are building such ship to cruise the seas of love.

It’s bothersome if one partner in love carries the burden of bringing along all the material to build a ship of love while another fellow partner in love is relaxing.

Such project will fail along the way and that ship won’t fit to stand strong against current and heavy sea waves, finally it sinks. I am trying to say a woman and man in love should participate to grow their relationship.

Yes, love still exists and you should not give up on it. We as women let’s scrutinize the grains that are thrown by the men. Men who always throw grains should also be cautious not to feed a chicken that would eat your grains to come close to you and scratch your face.

I remember when I was growing up in the rural areas, there was a cockerel that would chase and scratch my body if I fed the chickens.

Yes that cockerel would eat maize grains but it would attack me as well, I used to cry while my body was bleeding of the deep scratches made by its sharp claws. It is very difficult to up bring a puppy once it becomes a dog, it savages you in return.

Chapter 12.

Respect in the name of love:

Respect is one of the characteristics your relationship should have. I am talking about a man respecting his woman and woman also respects her man.

Existence of respect in the relationship is a mirror where a man and woman in love look themselves from it.

Respect among the wife and husband is reflected among their children at home to respect one another as well.

Respect rules the words you utter every day to your partner, it also reflected to your body language.

Body language speaks louder than words. When your partner moves out of the house while still talking to him or her, it shows disregard, and impudence.

If your partner tells you how much she loves you over the line, and you would sneeringly stick out your tongue at her because she can’t see you, reciprocating love words to her would be like betraying yourself, and the relationship you have.

Body get used of bad habit that you always do, one day you would stick out your tongue out of sneer, and she would be much offended once she notices that kind of behaviour.

Respect starts from respecting yourself.

Respecting yourself, means to refrain from mentioning harsh words, and insults.

Respecting yourself, means you wouldn’t be found at the places that degrades your dignity as a man or woman.

It degrades a man’s dignity if a man is found among street sluts while he has his wife, or girlfriend at home.

Respect is inherited from the upbringing of a child. A child that is brought up with respect would hold that respect in her heart until she becomes an adult.

It is very important to teach a child a respect to keep that light shining even with his or her relationship, once she or he becomes an adult.

A family that doesn’t have respect it running a risk of maintaining unhealthy and mediocre relationship.

I believe true love lays a strong respect foundation as a base of entire relationship. Relationship without respect tends to fall apart easily.

Respect encourages cool atmosphere of love at home and anywhere else. A man’s heart melts when his woman bows in front him, when she brings breakfast in the morning.

Woman’s heart is taken away when his man treasure her in his heart and treat her as a woman.

Chapter 13.

Polygamous relationship:

Polygamous relationship is when a man gets married with more than one female partner. Such relationship has been there for years and some other cultures and religions still believe in polygamous relationship.

A bible says King Solomon had 700 wives and 300 girlfriends that made up to 1000 women that were in the love relationship with him alone.

Some African countries are still practising polygamous relationship. Shembe religion in South Africa permits a man to have many wives as he likes. Muslim religion followers also still believe in polygamous relationship.

From the woman’s point of view, I think polygamous is contravening women rights to choose.

There would be no woman that would approve such relationship except being compelled by the certain circumstances, i.e. religious commands or man’s intentions to have an extra marital relationship.

It’s very common and natural that women they tend not to get along each other. There will always be a fierce competition among women at each other.

Such competition varies from the clothing format, hair styles, cars, and houses owned, etc. Competition among women that I should appear better than any woman would never end even when are married into a polygamous relationship to any man.

I believe any man that wants extra marital relationships is applying for an unsettled love affair at his house. Woman’s heart doesn’t share when comes to love.

If I am in love with my man, I need him day and night by my side as always. Woman’s heart in love wants a freedom to own.

I want to own my man, I want to own my house, and I want to own my children yet recognizing a head of the house of which is my man.

There is a saying that says,’ too many people spoil the broth.’ Yes King Solomon in the bible had some many wives but his mission to praise God turned away by these women.

If a man has an extra marital status, he should depend on his personal judgement as a man to grow such relationship. A man’s success is determined by the woman in his life.

Natural politics among women would also be there in the man’s extra marital relationship and it would destruct a man’s focus to progress in life.

Sexual satisfaction in a polygamous relationship would be compromised. Love relationship is complemented by love making that was made to encourage love between two people in love.

When we couldn’t able to agree on a certain subject, love making should interfere to fix such errors and give us that opportunity to call each other with those sweet words, definitely disagreement would vanish.

Grudges in a polygamous relationship are like a time bomb that you don’t when it would explode when love making detonation is nowhere to be found.

Polygamous relationship affects the children negatively when the head of the house mind was distracted by one of his favorite wives.

Only God make the weather to rain over the good and the bad. Human love would be always conditional towards other people especially in a polygamous relationship where a man can not deal with a single issue and solve it immediately.

If the older wife loses some taste of love in the man’s tongue, she would be penalised to suffer the consequences by that man when he stops supporting the children of than woman when the younger wife stole his heart a great deal out of anything and everything.

Chapter 14.

Long distance relationship:

A long distance relationship is a definition of love partners that are living apart from each other due to various reasons.

One of the reasons that cause long distance relationship is work commitment at different places.

If you want to measure high level of trustworthiness between the two people in love, ask the love partners that maintain a long distance relationship.

I say the level of trust is high between them, because the blood of a human being always yearns to misbehave.

I always regard those love partners that maintain long distance relationship as soldiers of love and trust.

There is a saying that says, ’familiarity breeds contempt but absence grows heart fonder.’ I am not agreeing with such saying because I believe healthy love doesn’t breeds contempt despite familiarity or absence.

As I mentioned that long distance relationship meets the definition of two people in love that are living apart due to certain reason, it quite frustrating to find out that there are some love partners that are living together but maintain long distance relationship at home.

I always say, life is too short for those disregards to one another, can’t talk to each other for days.

Long distance relationship while you live together throws those special moments down the drain. Healthy relationship commands those golden special moments that were well spent together to cherish them in your hearts until death do you apart.

I associate healthy relationship with bees and honey. Two bees in love should work hand in hand to make sweet honey love. Dual visions should be together to select sweet nectar and avoid sour nectar that would spoil your sweet honey relationship.

Onus is upon all love partners to concoct their honey whether to become sweet or sour. Good works between the two of you should be seen on the honey you eat every day.

Love as honey was made to be sweet but discretion is upon yourselves to collect relevant nectar.

It is very hard to binge or gobble down something that is sour, you would frown and grin your face, out of the bad taste.

Once a bee formed a sweet honey, it bears some babies. Upbringing of those children becomes a privilege when they experience sweetness environment created by their parents.

I grew up in the rural areas of Msinga – South Africa and my brother used to bring honey in winter and I have never taste sour honey.

If love partners collect sour nectar, they would reap sour honey and children grow up in that environment they will never learn how to make sweet honey.

Chapter 15.

Apologizing and forgiving:

They say it’s human to do mistakes. This is very true, we live on earth where everything and anything is probably to happen when we err.

Mistakes appear throughout the walks of life. Christians believe that God created the world and He also complemented life with challenges to test how strong your faith is. Luke 11:2-4 says, ‘Pray then like this: ‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.’

God would only forgive your mistakes once if you are able to forgive others as well. God knew that human being on earth is susceptible to err somewhere and somehow.

There is no one on earth who doesn’t err at some point in life. 1 John1:8 in the bible says, ‘If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us.’

I would say it is very wrong to judge anybody in accordance with what he or she has done mistakably. It is very vital important to forgive a person if he or she has done anything wrong to you. You are not in the position to judge that person because tomorrow it would be your turn to fall into the pit of errors, and you would need to be forgiven as well.

Forgiving can be like swallowing burning coal down into your belly and it calls for maturity. Healthy love relationship dissolves mistakes into joy and happiness.

Apologizing can be conditional if love relationship is based on certain conditions. Love relationship that centres on who has a bigger financial muscle than who, can compel a partner with lower financial muscle to apologize for mistakes she or he never do.

Apologizing will always be a fire extinguisher to put down a blazing fire of anger and get back to love again.

Many love partners have offered many gifts as tokens for being apologetic to their fellow love partners they wronged. Many people believe that flowers facilitate apologizing and forgiving process, this is not wrong but it makes love to be conditional. Love shared between the two hearts of a man and women in the relationship is more than any tokens to show how apologetic you are. Waiting for gifts as tokens given when apologizing can delay a process of forgiving before a gift is given.

Apologizing partner should show in deep of his heart that he or she is sorry about the inconveniences caused to another fellow partner. A word, ‘sorry’ should be said with an empathy heart to the victim. A word ‘sorry’ should not be uttered in vain without a meaning. A partner would say, ‘sorry’ in vain because he or she knows that her or his fellow partner loves him or her so dearly therefore an apology would be definitely accepted one way or the other.

It is very important to avoid harsh words during apologizing moments. When starting to engage conciliation discussion between the two of you, victim’s words uttered can backfire at you a great deal. This would be the moment in time to use good words to avoid conflict to erupt again. Remember there is no one justified when fighting in the war.

A swimmer uses two arms to move the body in the water. Arms are used to move and avoiding a body to sink. Arms would exchange each other to move the body around in the water. When the left arm paddling underneath, the right one would appear on top of the water to gain a strength to move forward.

I associate love relationship as the body that would call for two arms, i.e. women and man in the relationship to keep it floating. It is very important that if your partner is high in the air with anger then a fellow partner should lower himself underneath the water to keep the body relationship going.

Chapter 16.

Are men dogs?:

People who were hurt in their relationship choose to be single for quite some time if not for the rest of their lives. There is a high number of women who are the victims of circumstances than men when everything go awry in love relationship.

I asked a couple of single women I know in my area about the causes that led to live a lonely life. Their responses were almost the same that men are dogs, they left them for another new love relationship with other women of their choices.

Most of men I spoke with, have many unsuccessful love relationships and they never give up until they are have a stable one. I then realised that there are many women who are single than men. Pointing fingers at each other is always the case when issues erupt in the love relationship.

People of the world let’s face the truth, a man was created to be the head and a leader in almost everything. If the leader does not lead by example and take control of love relationship effectively, that love would definitely die. Rule of thumb says a leader choose, that’s why fingers are pointed towards men who cause love relationship to fail.

Train coach requires a head engine to travel far away distances. In this life I saw many train coaches abandoned and left at their own devices stucked in the scary jungles and lonely mountains. Heavy loads still lay heavy on their back and their heads are towing other couches.

I always say love would come into existence once lust is removed from men. I am saying this because a man would find it easy to camouflage his lust with love when approaching any women he craves for. We all know that a man’s weakness is in his eyes whereas a woman’s weakness is in her heart that melts too easily.  I beg to differ with men who believe that love would be ignited once lust took its course in the outset.

I would like to indicate that a woman was created to look beautiful for the man’s eye to be captivated and approach as a result. Her beautifulness would be complemented by the respect and humbleness to make that woman your lifetime partner.

There is a law in the bible that was put by God that a human being should multiply each other and subdue the world. That law created a craving especially on top of all men as heads. It is very possible for a woman to stay single for many years but any man would find it hard to stay for at least 3 days without making love. Such cravings make a man lie about love when approaching a woman to relieve their natural desires.

I always say a true man would control such cravings to avoid too many unsuccessful relation out of covets. Many women are left alone while being pregnant and deliver babies while their fathers are nowhere to be found.

A law of God of multiplying and subdue the world do apply towards animals as well but any of those animals was made to mate one another during certain seasons. Human being is not compelled by any natural seasonal desires to fall in love, because his actions are guided by his common sense. Natural desires are there but onus was left with upon us to make valid decision that we would not regret our actions.

I strongly believe that many unsuccessful relationships were due to someone who could not able to control his natural cravings when they attacked him.

Chapter 17.

Love changes everything:

In life, we need each other. Genesis 2.22 says that God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. Woman creation by God speaks high volume that we need each other.

When you are on the hunting expedition for your soul mate, you are susceptible to all sorts of risks that would linger over your head once you accommodate each other as love partners. Adam in the bible led a peaceful life with no curses up until Eva came to his life and led him astray.

People are raised from the different upbringing environments and that make them vary in terms of their thinking methods. I always regard people who enter new relationship as soldiers that sacrifice their lives to feed what the hearts want. Accommodating one another in love means that you accept each other no matter what set of qualities attached against their upbringings when love takes its course.

Love teaches an old dog some new tricks but when it’s gone true colours emerge to show a person’s real inborn characters.

I always believe that love that was built on a strong foundation gets rid all those different backgrounds and cultivates dual communions between the man and woman in love.

Encounters in love should be beneficial to one another sparingly. Changes that are brought by the partners in love should beneficial in terms of new sets of thoughts, vision, and assistance to one another to fulfil certain goals in life together.

Rule of thumb reveals that for every successful man in the world there is a wise woman behind that man. Does your presence in your man’s life constructive or destructive? Rule of thumb also reveals than woman are smarter than man. Do we use such smartness we possess to steal our men minds to reap them off for our own benefits or guide them into the correct directions?

A man’s house without a woman is cold as death but arrival of a wise woman to the man’s life enlighten up the house and become cosy through her natural skills of multi-tasking.

I have done my own research that most of men who does not have women soul mates, drown their sorrows by binging alcohol. When wise woman come into such man’s life and speak sense to him, he would find no reason to take any sorts of intoxicating substances.

I strongly believe that it is useless to drink alcohol and become a drunkard while you have a lovely wife and the children to look after.

A change a man brought to the woman’s life is portrayed when he respects and values her in his heart. A man’s support towards his woman and the whole family would always be seen as a token of love and caring. Calling your women at work and tell how much you love her, would bring a change in her life to know how much is she appreciated by her man.

An engine can’t run using petrol only, when there is no oil and water its pitch changes strangely while internal mechanism is destroying until it gets burst. When oil and water poured into the correct channels, they then lubricate those pipes and stabilize faulty engine mechanism to run smoothly.

When you find a soul mate in your life, changes should be seen and felt deep down into your soul and find the strength to tread forward ever together.

Chapter 18.

Harmony in the name of love:

There was a research that was done some time ago that if a man and woman in the love relationship squabble more often, their love affair becomes stronger as before, once they have forgiven each other.

I beg to differ with such research because those harsh words and insults uttered when fighting are difficult to get rid of them in the mind. Such words leave an indelible mark that takes time to vanish.

There is no reason to quarrel in the love relationship. You will be soon become the idiots of anger and harsh words when you are kissing and cuddling one another again. It always challenging to face with those harsh words and insults you angrily uttered to your partner once you get back to love again. Those harsh words and insults growl like a charged dog ready to savage all of your good love feelings and cripple them.

I grew up in the rural areas and I used to draw water from the river. Water from that river was cool, fresh, and clear as the sky above. Food cooked by that water would taste good and healthy.

One day, I went to river to draw some water again but unfortunately I found a cow standing in the water while messing with it. I chased a cow away and I waited a day long for the water to clear up. Water could not clear up hence I filled up my container as dirty it was.

When I got home, I prepared some food and served my family. Food was very hard even to get it down our gullets as it was also soiled since it was cooked using soiled water from the river as well.

In the morning my father fenced a place where the water was, to avoid cattle from messing up water in the trench. Afterwards we then continued to use clean water to cook and drink with no dirt. Cattle would go down the stream to drink and play around in the water far from the fenced area.

I am trying to say, your love relationship should always remain crystal clear as the sky above. Cattle to soil it should not be allowed. I associate those harsh words and insults as cattle that eager to drink and soil that clear waters of your love relationship.

When your relationship is dirty with harsh words and insults like water messed up by that cow, it takes great deal of time to clear up. Kisses and love making become a sham as detestable food that I cooked by the water that was soiled by cow.

Put a fence around your waters of love to avoid a mess to repeat itself in your relationship. A fence in this regard would be revisiting and renew those vows you pledged to abide by on your wedding day. Fence involves apologies and forgiveness at each other. Stern promises should be made that such horrible incidences should go down the stream and leaves your fenced areas of love clean and purified.

Fence in your clear waters of your relationship, is to respect your husband and compliment him when he supports his family constantly. Many men out there fail to support their family when their interests are shifted elsewhere.

Compliment is due, give it when your man come home every day, you may wonder how many men out there that does not come home for days when their interests change directions.

Fence in your purified waters of your love relationship is to support your woman during her pregnancy by untying the laces of her shoes. Walk her to the bedroom, lay her down and place your hand on her tummy to feel your baby while moving about.

Fence circled your relationship is to call your woman at work and tell how much you love her, she deserve it, remember, you have chosen her out of the many women and said you love her. Your women is the most beautiful lady in the whole world wide, let her know that every day.

Strong fence around your cool, clear mountain stream of relationship is to get rid of harsh words and insults on your tongues. Sweet romantic words should rule to tell the body and the mind that they feed from the clean, fresh and healthy mountain spring water with no room of dirt.

You what you eat. Our body system and mind adapt easily to behave what you are preaching and believing in. If you feed your body system and mind with harsh words, insults and vulgar language, love disappears and your faces become ugly with stress.

Mind and bodily system that are fed from romantic words make your bodies look healthy and smooth with no rash on it. Healthy love is a good doctor of all fatal diseases.

Chapter 19.

Ship of love:

Entering into a new love relationship is like building a ship to travel in the sea. If a ship is built, a man and woman in love come with different material to construct it.

If your partner bring along nails, you should bring hammer and planks to construct a ship of love. Partners of love should ensure that foundation is strong enough to support roof and the contents of the ship inside. Engineers of love make their ship sturdy enough against rough seas and unpredictable weather.

Constructing a ship will always different from constructing a small boat that uses hand oars to propel through the water. Such small boat is not fit enough to travel long distance a ship would go. When you meet your love partner for the first time, his or her dedications and interests depict commitment to construct love relationship to be strong. Ship of love between the man and woman should be constructed from a design plan that both of you understand.

Drafting a plan of your love ship calls for innovative minds that from a man and woman in love. Mission and vision of such project should be stated clearly on your work plan. Material brought by the love partners should show how serious you are to construct colossal ship. There would be some time where a woman would bring serious material of high quality to build strong ship of love whereas a man would bring forward materials of no value.

Branding of such material would be different in terms of the dimensions and design planning. It is evident that the project you embarked on would be a sham. A ship love that was constructed while there no dual communication between the woman and man in love would be seen in the middle of the waters. Departing from the shore would raises some concern if this ship of love would stand the test of rough seas and stormy weather.

When such ship encounters dangerous waves, it becomes shattered and sinks with both occupants. Pointing fingers at each other would erupt from your emotions, blaming one another about the construction of this ship. Love makes everything beautiful in the outset. It makes a woman or man cannot notice if his or her fellow partner bring along material of poor quality to construct a ship of love. Sinking of such ship would make you realise that material used while constructing it do not match one another.

It is very painful to another fellow love partner when a ship becomes a wreck in the middle of nowhere knowing that you did whatever it takes to construct a strong ship with a vision in mind that it would travel long distances.

What a waste of time and energy of the fellow love partner that was blinded by love to dare unsafe journey in the deepest of oceans when a ship starts to sink. I cannot imagine his or her sadness and wails.

It is very important to notice commitment of your fellow partner while still drafting a design plan of your love ship. The beautiful waves and rainbows in the seas should not tempt you to risk your life by boarding a mediocre ship. If you commit yourself enough to bring steel beams while your so called love partner bring along plastic suspensions, you would know that commitment is very far from him or her.

Steel beam of love would be depicted when you appreciate and value one another so dearly. Steel beam of love is shown when a man and woman in love commit themselves as wife and husband when they get married.

Commitment between the man and woman in love should balance and it’s determine material you would need to build a strong ship of love.

Designing a ship construction requires detailed work plan to finish a project that would an outstanding craft from the engineers of love.

Once you completed constructing your ship of love, spare parts and tool box are required to fix any faults along the way. Your ship love uses engines to paddle in the water. These engines require interval maintenance.

Maintenance of engines, makes your ship travels continuously. These engines need oils of sweet words such as ‘sweetheart, darling, dear etc. These words lubricate the engines of love to propel against the strong current.

Ship of love requires super mechanics that have toolbox by their side with all necessary tools to fix any faults that can cause havoc.

Your toolbox should include these following tools:

  • Respect:

Respect is a main screwdriver to fasten any gaps where harsh words and insults leaks. When harsh words is pronounced it must dealt with and halted from repetition. When harsh words are not halted from the beginning, it would become rife to the detrimental of your relationship. Insults are like rust that consumes the structures where the engines of your ship love stand. It is vital important to get rid of such rust first and foremost.

  • Unconditional love:

Unconditional love is a hammer to hit material objects that turn natural love into a disaster. Loving a person because of his or her affluent depicts a love relationship that lacks foundation. Panel beating corrugated or dented surface of your ship love caused by the rocks of conditional love, requires an unconditional love hammer to straighten up.

  • Apologizing:

Fire extinguishers are required to be installed inside your ship. Apologizing is a cylinder filled with gas to extinguish a fire when it starting to blaze. When a ship caught fire, there would no survivals when furnace is gutting everything and anybody. A word, ‘sorry’ does not cost any dollar, pound or rand, you should give it when it’s due.

  • Forgiveness:

Forgiveness is a spare part to replace what is damaged by fire. It’s takes two to tango towards love relationship, it’s all about  giving and taking. When a fire extinguisher expels its gas onto the fire, furnace should die. As soon as I see a smoke, I quickly realise that our ship love is at stake. I care about the ship safety hence I quickly grasp a fire extinguisher cylinder to kill a blaze. Apologizing and forgiveness are the main tools for your ship love to travel too far.

  • Humbleness:

Humbleness is one of the screwdriver that should be in your toolbox. A man is head of the house, he deserve respect from his woman. A man would reciprocate with complete love towards his woman. Harsh approach to your man degrades a man’s dignity to feel useless before the children or friends. A woman can utter many words than a man therefore humbleness and submissiveness to your man will always be appreciated while your man cannot defend himself with many words. Proverbs 21:19  says, ‘It is better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and fretful wife.’ When you created this ship, everyone came with different material to complete a construction of your ship love fully. Your both input to keep it floating on the water is also necessary.

  • Happiness:

Serious commitment to your journey does not mean you should not enjoy yourselves. Swim in the swimming pools, play tennis and eat and enjoy good food along your journey. Onus is upon the love partners to ensure that journey does not breed boredom.

  • Communication:

Communication begun when you were drafting a designing plan of your ship love. Directions of this ship should be based on the consensus between a man and women in love.  You should reach a dual agreement on what oils and spare parts to be used to keep a ship moving. Fuel consumed by the engines should be the one we both recommend. If the engines were made to consume petrol for the ship to move, let it be as per your designing plan. If your engines consume paraffin, you should refill their tanks with it. If an engine comes a petrol it cannot run on paraffin because when your ship get stucked, lack of communication would appear.

  • Support:

You should not forget a tool, support, in your toolbox. Journey is long and tiresome. When you notice that your partner in love is losing interest or attention to the maintenance of love ship, invite him or her to review those work plans in terms of vows you took in front of a priest when you got married.

Skills about maintaining our ship should come in variety from the both parties in love as per ones expertise. An expertise of supplying good quality fuel of good kissing should not stop. Skill of supplying sweet good words such as, ‘baby, sweetheart, darling, and dear should not be curtailed.Stoppage of such supplies would always a threat to your journey and it would cause a ship to stop and sink.

Titanic was built strong and beautiful to travel long distance but unfortunately, it crashed against an iceberg. Titanic is all about two lovers, Jack and Rose. They did not construct ship, but it belonged to them as they were on board enjoying their journey. They had all the ups and down on the ship but support to one another was evident when a ship sunk.

Jack support towards his woman was evident when he had to find a piece of debris from the wreckage. He made Rose to sit on top of the debris while cold icy water made him freeze to death.

Love inside your heart pushes you to the end hence to  die for someone you love so dearly.

  • Leadership:

A ship would have its captain to drive it around.  Leadership is a tool that was given by the Nature to a man and lead a voyage. Man should know that a steering wheel of this ship of love rest with their hands. I believe that if the captain of Titanic paid necessary attention, ship should not have crash against an iceberg. A ship of love direction is always determined by the controls of a man. Partners in love should understand their roles to keep a ship going. All roles from the both parties in love are necessary for the ship to travel on its voyage.

  • Lovemaking:

Love making is a tool to encourage love in the heart of a man and woman in love to flourish. Love making cannot solve problems on its own but it becomes more enjoyable if your relationship is healthy.

Chapter 20.

Moses’s face:

Heart in the love is a heaven, you would need to work hard to be welcomed in. You should not disregard the matters concerning religion. Yes, admit that when you get married or whenever there is funeral service in your house, religious service would be definitely be conducted, therefore, allow me to quote on religious matters when I am explaining some certain facts.

I as I mentioned earlier on that heart is a heaven where sins are not allowed. God created a bible to serve as guidance to ascertain that heaven is always purified as ever. There is also a constitution that monitors peoples’ behaviour in a certain countries’ system of governance to maintain harmonised atmosphere around the citizen of that country.

Love relationship, neither guided by bible nor constitution. Onus rests upon the man and woman in love relationship to devise their own bible or constitution that they would follow to avoid their hearts being hurt.

Bible contains 10 commandments that were scripted by God himself. Moses went up in the mountain of Sinai to meet with God and He drafted those rules on the slabs of stones. God did not used a paper to jot down some of His writings, but He engraved them on the slabs of stone lest not be erased, if they were written on the paper.

A meeting between God and Moses, would be shown when a man approaches a woman for the first time they meet. A mouth and the tongue of a man, are the writing pens on the slabs of stone in the heart of a woman in the Mt. Sinai of love.

A woman; Moses, is always a good listener when a man; God, is giving commandment in the high summit of love. When Moses; woman, climbs up this mountain, she sacrifices her life that would be prone to various perilous situations. Climbing high mountain, is not easy because the air you would breath, becomes very thin and it can lead to suffocation and demise. Starving wild wolves, wander up and down the mountain, when they are on the hunting expedition for any prey.

These are the perilous situations, a woman would dare when she has to approve a man’s advances. Once a woman reaches on the summit of love, a man should speak words of wisdom and engrave them into her heart.

Words of wisdom, ascertain that she needs not to worry about any perils in the mountain of love, she is safe in his hands. I believe that Moses’s feelings were blowing hot and cold, eager about what to anticipate in the Mt. Sinai. A woman, would be like Moses when her feelings would also blow hot and cold about what to expect on the summit of this mountain of love, once her heart melts away by the man’s advances.

A man should make her feel at home and make her seat on the green pastures of the mountain; love. Beautiful landscapes look good when you are standing on the peak of the mountain. Show her the crystal, clear, river that meanders through the bush in the lower part of the mountain. Go down and taste water from that river. Make her watch that beautiful, long, waterfall that splash aimlessly against those rocks of love.  Swim together and watch your bodies glimmering when arising sun rays in the morning come through the nourished leaves to sparkle your bodies. Swimming in the daylight together, would give an opportunity to examine your bodies thoroughly.

Waiting until its evening to swim in the pool of love, would snitch away that special chance to examine ones’ bodies.  It does not sound good if you spend good quality time in the mountain of love with a stranger.

Moses had to go down the mountain to pass a message from God to the people that were waiting for him. A can of worms opened when he threw, broke, those stones that were written God’s commandment on them. He broke those rocks out of anger when those people were misbehaving, cheating on God. People could notice Moses’s face that it was glimmering out of love that he experienced in the top of the mountain. Finally, his face stopped from shining and returned to its originality when he was among those people that were sinning against God.

It is utmost crucial to remain in the mountain of love to keep your face and body glimmers in the pool of love. It is also very common to find a woman go down the mountain and break those sweet words in her heart that were engraved by her man. Third person tends to sway away your love relationship towards wrong direction. If Moses had remained in the mountain, his face would not have switch off its glimmers of love.

A face and body that live in the abundance of love, shines like a tinkling star in the sky. Do not go down the mountain of love, live with your husband on the top of the mountain. When you are on the peak of mountain, it becomes easy to shout and tell evil people to stay away from your mountain of love.

Love partners, should put a fence in the foot of their mountain of love to prevent a third person to intrude. A mountain of love is a sacred place where your feet walk freely without any disturbance of any intruders or aliens.

It is common to find snakes and scorpions underneath rocks in the mountain. Snakes are your fights in the mountain of love that make both of you enemies. Scorpions in the mountain of love would emerge, when you do not call your wife at work to tell how much you love her. Snakes would appear, when you go down the mountain of love and join cheaters of love and break those rocks of commandments in your heart like Moses in the bible.

Root out all snakes and scorpions because are dangers in your mountain of love.

Mountain of love jungles, fraught of dangerous wild wolves, lions, and leopards. A lion in the mountain of love would savage your relationship when you are hitting your wife. A wolf in the peak of the mountain of love, is when you do not respect your husband. Leopard will be dangerous to your love affair, when you do not talk to each other for days.

A river passing by can look cool to swim but crocodiles would be on the prowl to snatch your sweet relationship away. Crocodile in the rivers of love, is when you talk bad about your partner behind his or her back to your friend or colleagues.

Mutual removal of such perilous situation in the mountain of love, would speak high volume of your willingness to live a happy life up there.

Chapter 21.

Let it rain:

There are four season in a year. There is spring, summer, autumn, and winter. When winter is over, there would be some beautiful rains that pour down over the trees and grass, if spring sets in.Green leaves and grass would develop gradually from a dry tree and barren land. Cool shades would give us a shelter from the scorching sun that beats down pitilessly on earth.

During this time, birds are twittering different and outstanding sounds, while resting on the branches of every tree.

Colourful butterflies adorn our blue skies above. Sweet aroma from the daffodils fumigates our world with sweet scent for everyone to inhale and feel revived. When spring sets in, it makes people alive and happy.

People would become happy because there are many good things that summer brings. I grew up in the rural area where we would cultivate the land and grow various crops in the field during summer. When those crops are ripen, we would conduct a special, joyous, ceremony to welcome fresh produce in our households. Urban people would throw some summer time parties to enjoy a season. Other people who enjoy swimming, they would head up to the sea beach and cool themselves when it’s hot.

When your relationship is still new, it becomes a spring. Women and a man in the outset of their relationship should smell that sweet smell from the daffodils of love. Love partners should see new sprouts shoot out from the ground gradually after the drizzles of sweet words that would be exchanged between them.

New love affair between the man and woman should bring about spring and finally developed into summer time to their relationship. Let the rain of love flow onto your bodies and become drenched for that matter.

I used to associate thunder and the rain with our men in our lives. I associate women as cool, summer breeze. Women are also the sun that should bring warmth at home.

A man can experience cold loneliness as in winter when there is no woman in the house. It’s unfortunate when a house commands coldness when a woman is around. Winter in the house is brought by a noisy woman. When a lady of the house is loud and disrespectful, she brings Antarctica at home.

A thunderbolt is very dangerous to strike anything down instantly in the house. Wind as well can be powerful to destroy everything when it becomes a tornado at home. These two weather conditions should learn to remain neutral and supply what is required for the crops of love to grow in the fields.

When a man’s voice thunders, let it be the sign of rain with sweet words. A rain that would touch the stem and roots of a woman’s heart softly to grow in love abundantly. Thundering of a man’s voice, should not be the sign of a hailstorm to hit a tender plant of love and become tattered. Roaring thunder of a man’s voice should not be the sign of a dangerous thunderbolt to strike his woman dead with harsh words and insults.

Heavy summer winds should not be the sign to blow your men away. Many dead men were killed by their fellow female love partners to benefit from life covers once they become aware of being the heirs of those insurance. Existence of a woman should bring a sweet scented breeze in the house for her man to inhale as always. Strong and rough wind of disrespectful words that you would say to your husband would also blow him away out of the house.

When rain stops falling, everything become dry and withered. A rain continues to pour down if you are able to compliment your woman. I am a woman and I know that all women’s heart melt away when they are told by their male counterparts in their lives that they are important, loved and beautiful. Such words are the source of rain that reaches the bottom of any woman’s heart. A heart like dehydrated plant in the barren land would become frail if there is a drought of rain with tasty words.

They are many men that have rains in their mouths and thoughts but they decide to withdraw them from their regular love partners to flow them elsewhere. Some men withdraw those rains of sweet words deliberately when are not used anywhere else but they lost interest to irrigate onto their love partners.

There are some men who stoop very low to make love while there is a drought in the fields. Making love without the rain of sweet words is a rape. Rain of romantic words from a man make a woman’s body slither with joy. Bitter words make autumn to set in and develop into winter at your house. Winter commands cold, dry, and windy weather.

Men as the leaders and heads of their homes should determine what seasons they command into their relationship. Marriages always command spring and summer atmosphere, it frustrating if you brought your wife into your house to lead a cold and dry season, while a ring in her finger becomes a facade of spring and summer spirit that would not be found in your marriage.

I just want to tell you that a rain symbolize love that would never end. God made a rainbow in the sky to pass His message to the people and all creatures that He won’t ever destroy life with water again, see Genesis 9. Rainbow beautiful colours speak high volume of God’s love He had for the nature.

Rainbow appears when there is rain if sun rays are shining through. This should be a daily covenant between the hearts of a man and woman in love that there would be no heavy storm or hailstorm to kill their relationship in the long run.

When a rainbow appears in the sky, we always remember an agreement God made between Him and the people that He won’t eradicate them by water, yet rain should continue pouring down to support all life with water.

A rainbow colours between the man and woman in love should be always bright in their hearts. A man as a thunderstorm and the rain, a woman as the sun and cool breeze should make an everlasting covenant through a brightful rainbow in their hearts. Thunderstorm and rain can cause a great deal of havoc but a man would make an agreement to flow sweet rain drops onto his woman.

Wind is also dangerous when it sweeps away everything on land and the sun can burn everything into ashes. A woman as a cool breeze and sun would also make an agreement to bring warmth and the scented summer breeze into her house as always.

Chapter 22.

Accommodating previous relationship children:

 Luke 1:26-38:

God sent the angel Gabriel to Nazareth, a city in Galilee.  The angel went to a virgin promised in marriage to a descendant of David named JosephThe virgin’s name was Mary. When the angel entered her home, he greeted her and said, “You are favoured by the Lord! The Lord is with you.”

 She was startled by what the angel said and tried to figure out what this greeting meant.

The angel told her,

“Don’t be afraid, Mary. You have found favour with God.
You will become pregnant, give birth to a son, and name him Jesus. He will be a great man and will be called the Son of the Most High.

The Lord God will give him the throne of his ancestor David. Your son will be king of Jacob’s people forever, and his kingdom will never end.” Mary asked the angel, “How can this be? I’m a virgin.” The angel answered her, “The Holy Spirit will come to you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. Therefore, the holy child developing inside you will be called the Son of God. Elizabeth, your relative, is six months pregnant with a son in her old age. People said she couldn’t have a child. But nothing is impossible for God.” Mary answered, “I am the Lord’s servant. Let everything you’ve said happen to me.”

Then the angel left her.


Matthew 1:18-21:

“Now this is how the birth of Jesus Christ came about. When his mother Mary was betrothed to Joseph, but before they lived together, she was found to be with child of the Holy Spirit.
Joseph her husband, being a just man, and unwilling to put her on public display, decided to divorce her quietly.
Such was his intention when, behold, the angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary your wife into your home on account  it is through the Holy Spirit that this child has been conceived in her.
She will bear a son and you are to name him Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.”

When Joseph awoke from sleep he did what the angel of the Lord told him. He took his wife, but did not have marital relations with her until she gave birth to a son, whom he called Jesus


 While He was still speaking to the multitudes, behold, His mother and brothers were standing outside, seeking to speak to Him and someone said to Him, “Behold, Your mother and Your brothers are standing outside seeking to speak to You.” But He answered the one who was telling Him and said, “Who is My mother and who are My brothers?” And stretching out His hand toward His disciples, He said, “Behold, My mother and My brothers! “For whoever does the will of My Father who is in heaven, he is My brother and sister and mother.”


Joseph loved her wife hence he decided to lead her to the altar, but before they got married, Mary became pregnant with a child that was not his. There are many men out there who committed suicide and massacred their families out of anger caused by such incidences. I guess any men can’t bear with such kind of behaviour and patience would be lost to behave strangely. Do not jump a gun and make wrong decisions, life is too short for killing yourself or family, someone out there is waiting to respect and cherish you and get back to love again.

Joseph found it hard to accept his wife ordeal. He neither committed suicide nor kill Mary but he decided to divorce her. I think that would be a best option for the both of you to reach rather than killing yourselves because you do not have that right to take somebody else’s life or yours.  It was not Mary’s intentions to become pregnant but it was a situation that was beyond her understanding.

Joseph and Mary set a good example that if any unprecedented situation occurs in your relationship, you should then remain calm and resolve whatever hindrance amicably to continue and live.

Rape can be the unprecedented situation in your relationship where your wife becomes a victim of such horrible incidence when hooligans attack her. What would be your decision as a man of the house? Would you divorce or kill her? No! It would none of her intentions being mugged and raped. Show her some love and support like Joseph in the bible and find many reasons to love her again.

There are some people who take pleasure to spoil the relationship of the man and woman in love out of their evil minds. I personally do not recommend what God did to make Mary pregnant while she maintains a good relationship with her man. I am not saying God is evil, but I believe that He should have targeted any other virgins not in the love relationship at all.

Trauma that Joseph and Mary went through was uncalled for, taking into consideration love affair that was existing between them as they were about to get married.

I cannot imagine pains Joseph went through, when he found his wife pregnant while they had never made love. It was evident to him that his wife was unfaithfully.

I would like to applaud Joseph for the fact that he continued to love his wife; Mary despite the truth she gave birth to the child that was not his. I think there is no man who can accept such incidence because even Joseph was convinced by the God’s angel not to go ahead with a divorce against his wife; Mary, as he was resolved to do so.

Some relationships fail along the way while a man and woman in love got children. When their love affair is over, it becomes difficult to divulge a secrete of having previous relationship children to their new relationship partners once they break up.

Children that were born from the previous relationships should not bring about disgruntlement into your new relationship. It is very important to make your new love partner aware of children you had from the previous relationships. Most of women hide their previous relationship children when they enter into a new love affair with their male love partners.

Women hide such their previous relationship children because they do not want to be abandoned by those men they entered into a new love affair with them. Many women choose to let a cat outside the bag once they got married.

Divulging such secretes to your husband after marriage, it would be as if you were blackmailing him so that he would lead you to the altar.

A man is impressed by his woman who is trustworthy and respect. Once a woman breaks her trust in front of her man, it becomes improbable for that man to regain trust towards his woman.

It is utmost important to let your new man know about your previous relationship children you gave birth to. Truth would set you free, let him know about it and leave it to his discretion to decide whether he would continue with such love affair or not.

Can of worms would be opened when he comes to know by himself that you have been hiding your previous relationship children you had.

Mary informed her husband Joseph that she was to conceive a baby from the Holy Spirit. It was very difficult for him to accept that hence he thought about divorcing her. A matter was brought forward by God and His angels before Joseph not to leave his wife.

If Mary decided to keep it a secret until they get married, it would tear apart Joseph’s heart a great deal. Joseph was made to understand that Mary was about to conceive a baby from the Holy Spirit. This is a lesson from any woman that had children from the previous relationships to let a cat outside the bag early before any frustrations begin.

A human being heart and the mind are very easy to believe what is told by the words of mouth. Those words got assimilated and dwell in the mind forever. Those assimilated words; they brand a speaker to the true reflection of what he or she is.  When those words considered to be true about somebody get erased, it becomes difficult to believe and assimilates words that are different from the ones you initial uttered.

Love relationship that is built on the lying foundation doesn’t become successful in the long run. Talk truth from the beginning. If he decide to abandon you, let it be, I think it is better to let it go in the outset rather sit on the time bomb, do not know when and how it would explode.

Lies in the love relationship are like a tooth cavity that grows gradually. Once a tooth is succumbed by cavity it becomes painful until a dentist recommends removing it from your jaw.

Brushing off your teeth would keep cavities at bay and your teeth would be seen cleaned and whitened when you laugh. Revealing white teeth while a speck rests with one of your teeth when laughing will not be spectacular.

Your relationship is like smiling with crystal white clean teeth without any dirt. Lies should be brushed off from your tongue and teeth to maintain hygienic and spotless love affair.

Joseph and Mary noted a speck in their relationship; they resolved an issue and continue to love one another so dearly. Mary gave birth to Joseph’s children other than Jesus, it speaks high volume that Joseph loved his wife and he could not leave her despite what happened.

Joseph brought up Jesus as his stepfather. Joseph neither abuse nor mistreat his stepson: Jesus. He brought him up with love and he did not discriminate him among his children of his blood.

I have heard many stories where step fathers are having love affair with their stepdaughters and make them pregnant. Such incidences speak high volume that men are dogs. Eating a maize stalk and its corn shows some greediness and jealous, how can you do that?

Love your children equally despite being the stepsons or stepdaughters. Why taking your precious time to draw a line between your blood daughters and step daughters? Your mind is fraught of mischievous discrimination to satiate your evil wishes. What kind of a relationship you are maintaining between the mother and her daughter? Be a man of high standards and dignity.

I wish to become a man just one day and find out what is going on inside their mind when there are doing strange behaviors such as cheating with their step daughter and hookers while maintaining love affairs with their wives.

Chapter 23.

The love you know, you deserve:

People of the world, it’s very good to be in love. I love my husband and he loves me. Maybe you would ask, how I know that he loves me? Yes my husband loves me because he always tells me so daily. When we wake up in the morning my heart melts away when he says, “Darling, how did you sleep?” and I would say, “Yes my dear, I slept very well and you?” and he would say, “My darling, sleeping by your side is a blessing every night because our heats beat together in a rhythmic way like a drummer beating his drums to our soul, love, music in our relationship.” I know what he is talking about, in the middle of the night when everything becomes tranquil; we wake up and listen to the music our hearts produce when we hold each other closely. Yes, it is a lovely song coming from our hearts, it goes like, chuggadiggidiggiKATdumchuggaschagadadzzzz… diggididiggidiKAdumdum, it is amazing to feel our hearts jump together dances the night away to a lovely song playing into our souls and minds without a pause or skips.

Our love we share is good to our souls, it makes me smile and happy every day. When I think about my husband my heart fills with pleasure even when he is not around. My colleagues at work would ask reasons behind my happiness and I would ask them what they notice that I am happy? They would say my face is always lively and shining like a tinkling star in the sky, it doesn’t show any thin lines of wrinkles or blemishes. I would tell them that healthy love is physician of all time. Maintaining healthy relationship repels diseases away from you. A person into a healthy love won’t come down with headaches, toothaches, stomach-aches, high blood pressure (BP), shock, and cancer.

Healthy love affair you maintain makes you smile every day and smiling extends your life span without any illness in your body.

As I mentioned earlier on, hospital wards are filled to its capacities with patients that came down with fatal illnesses caused by bitter love affairs they maintained with their love partners at home. Actually, those people are not sick and hospital wards can be vacated once their love affair is sorted out. Stress in your relationship is like an HIV virus that finishes up your cells to be exposed to various diseases that would make you admitted to ICU at the local hospital.

People that maintain healthy relationship do not frown and their faces do not show those wrinkled lines to indicate that discontentment is a daily bread at home. A human being face is a mirror that reflect life your live, either sad or happy and you can’t hide it. A face that its owner is always unhappy resists any lotion application to make it normal. Neither Blue Seal Vaseline nor Vicks Vaporub would come to your rescue if your love affair is unhealthy. Leading a happy love affair would make your body silky smooth without applying an aqueous cream.

Kissing is one of the ways that lead to healthy relationship. There are some love partners that tasted a kiss once and for all when they got married because a priest who was officiating their marriage told them so, otherwise they wouldn’t. If you can’t kiss your wife, who should kiss her? If you can’t kiss your husband, who do you think should kiss him? Reasons that make a person to cheat are derived from somethings you would think are inanimate whereas they play important role to keep a fire blazing to cook your broth.

I grew up in the rural areas of Msinga in KwaZulu Natal. When I had to prepare for a food, I would go to the jungle and collect some woods. I would spend the whole day collecting woods and make it a long, heavy, bundle. I would lift that bundle of woods up and rest it on top of my head. I would rest after certain walking distance until I reach home. I would fling it on the ground and weight would shake a soil and everyone would be happy that I am home to cook for them. I would untie a bundle and take some few woods to make a fire. I would then put a big, black, three, legged pot on the fire to cook tasty stew for everyone to eat at home. When stew was not tender or ready to be devoured, I would make sure I put some more woods to make a fire blaze until food is tender and ready to be eaten. I knew what type of flavours I should add onto my stew to make it tastier and there would no one who was interfering with my cooking lest spoil my stew. A smell of stew I would cook at home in the lawn under a tree, would entice our neighbours’ sense of smell and they would compliment my skill of cooking and they would enquire my recipes as always.

I am trying to say once you started a fire of love affair; you need to be active in all respect to keep a big, black, three legged pot of your relationship boiling in the fire. Your relationship is like a stew, you are what you cook. Be the good chefs of love.

Stew of your love affair should send a tasty smell to everyone, they would see the two of you happy as always and asks for the recipes you use to make your love relationship flouring as always.

When a fire is dying down, you should notice and go to the bundle of woods to get some more sticks and put them into the fire. Bundles of woods comprises of many types of different kinds of trees to master your fire of the love affair maintained at home:


  • Woods of kisses:

Untie such woods and put them into the fire of love, such woods would make your fire of love blazing even more to cook your stew of love affair you share between the two of you. Do not be afraid to kiss anywhere and anyhow.


  • Woods of unconditional love:

Unconditional love is seen when a man and woman in love affair love each other so dearly despite educational qualifications or work positions they hold. You are the doctor at work but at home you are the woman that maintains a love relationship with your man, either married or not. You are a Chief Executive Officer (CEO) with your company but at home you are the man that is maintaining love affair with his woman, married or not.  Don’t bring a supervisor and supervisee relationship at home. Don’t bring boardroom meeting language in your bedroom. Be like actors in the soapies or drama, their personal lives are separate from what they are playing. Live a separate life between work and home because they are different a great deal.

Love affair and money doesn’t blend, it’s like water and paraffin. I heard another preacher saying that a rich woman when she is not born again in Jesus Christ is very dangerous because she won’t ever respect her man if he is poor. When a rich woman is a Christian devotee, is like a dangerous lion locked inside a cage that can savage her man once a cage would be opened.

I beg to differ; healthy love relationship between a man and woman in love affair is enough to eliminate any unconditional love adversities.


  • Woods of respect:

I will always stress the point of respect in love because it lays a strong foundation of love between the man and woman in love. Respect towards your woman is that you don’t beat her up. Women were not given a strength to fight therefore a man possess strong power than a woman. Man power should be used to chase criminals away, build houses and bridges when they carry heavy items. Men powers should not be used to abuse their women to assault them because they are powerless. I once heard that a certain man was frightening another man to say he is capable of hitting a person, you’d better ask his wife for clarity. Men that beat up women are nothing but useless, they are taking a good advantage how defenceless women are. Stop it! Stop it!

There were two neighbouring men that agreed to beat up their wives to show them that they are the heads of their houses. These two men were complaining at one another about bad attitudes of their wives towards them and they resolved to beat them all at once in the evening. One man said to his neighbour that once he hears his wife crying by 8h:00 pm, he should be then begin to beat his as well. They agreed at each and left. By 8h: 00 pm, other man colluded with his wife and made her cry as if he was beating her. When neighbouring man heard an outcry over the wall, he begun to hit his wife as agreed.

These two neighbouring men, met again in the morning. A man asked his neighbour, “What happened last night, did you beat her up?” Neighbour said, “Yes, I hit her a great deal, I heard that your wife was crying then I started to hit her as well, she can’t even walk, what about yours?.”

A man said, “She is groaning with pain as we speak, we taught them an unforgettable lesson my neighbour.”  This man knew from his heart that he did not hit his wife; he was making his neighbour a fool to hit his wife without a reason.

It is very important to discuss your issues with your wife or husband only because divulging your relationship issues to a third person can exacerbate problems in your relationship.

Respect one another lest make other people delight about your predicament.


  • Woods of the greatest love of all times:

Love should always be blazing like a fire and you should notice when it becomes faint. A trail of love relationship is very long, if your fellow love partner stumbles over a stone and fall, a helping hand from you is due then give it.

Life is fraught of many challenges therefore those burdens between the two of you should be shared equally. Man would approach woman out of beautifulness of her face and the curvaceous of her body. My question is, what would you do if your woman comes down with vitiligo? Would you be still loving and cherishing her in your heart? Maybe you are asking yourself, what is a vitiligo? A vitiligo is a skin condition where the whole body is losing its pigment and becomes patchy permanently.

Love that is built from the strong foundations would steadfast against any challenges posed by life. It’s vital important to expand your hearts limits and love each other beyond the boundaries of beauty, handsomeness, and curvaceous of the body. I am saying this because if you fell in love with a certain women out of cute legs, what you would do if she would be involved in a car accident that would cost her legs to be amputated, would you be still supporting her or you would disappear into thin air. There are many men and women in the world that were deserted by their love partners because of various diseases that struck them unexpectedly. There are many men and women who were left by their love partners because they were involved in the various accidents that left them disabled.

Greatest love of all time is shown when such incidences happen in your relationship, I say, put some more woods of greatest love of all time to blaze through those setbacks. If your husband is sick from any bodily cancer, love and support him all the way.

I know a certain man that chased away his wife because she couldn’t conceive a baby. I was so sad to hear such story and I ask myself, ‘what kind of love is that?’ That man continued to search for another woman and made her pregnant and led her to altar.

This reminds me a book of Genesis chapter 21:1 that wife of Abraham: Sarah couldn’t conceive a baby up until they were well advanced with age. Abraham couldn’t leave his wife Sarah but he continued to love her despite those setbacks.  Sarah eventually, became pregnant at her old age when God promised them that they would have a baby despite their old age. Sarah was 90 and Abraham was 100 years of old when Sarah became pregnant.

Sarah was very beautiful woman. It is evident that Abraham was captivated by her cuteness, he then approached her and they fell in love together. When life posed its negativity onto his wife Sarah when she couldn’t conceive a baby, Abraham showed that his love was beyond Sarah’s cute face as he continued to love his wife despite such negativity that came over their relationship.

Patience at one another in the love relationship speaks high volume when life poses difficult situation between the two of you. I should not speak about patience in the love relationship, it’s out of the picture because love is more than patience.


  • Woods of love making:

Sex is an activity in the process of your relationship that was made to add an interesting element into your love affair to find your love relationship interesting as ever. Sex is woods put into a fire that is already there and burning. Sex without love relationship is null and void, is like masturbating.

People of the world enjoyable sex is not an overnight process, you prepare for it the first day you met.

Words you uttered for the first time you met are very powerful because they enticed your hearts to love one another and made you one. A fire that burnt into your hearts for the first time shouldn’t die. As a woman I am hungry for those words, say them more, all over again. Let us live a life of exchanging sweet words every day, let’s maintain healthy love relationship that would make our sex life enjoyable as well.

They are some men who hardly pronounce a word, ‘Darling’ or ‘Sweetheart’ to their women if they are not making love. It’s so sad to be called such names when making love only. There are many women out there who are the slaves for their husbands or boyfriends when they are being beaten or told harsh words and demanded sex. You become a sex slave if your man is satisfying himself only while your heart is bleeding from his bad behaviours towards you.

Have you ever think that if you abuse your woman, how badly that would affect your sex life. If you maintain abusive love relationship, it becomes very hard to attain healthy love making as well.

They are many men and women in love that are always lamenting about their unsuccessful love making. I just want to challenge all the lovers of the world that they should scrutinize their behaviours towards their love relationship to attain enjoyable love making every day.  Your sex life problems are not of medical reasons but it’s your posture towards your love affair.

You always lamenting about poor performances when making love but you fail to call each other: ‘Darling’ or ‘Sweetie.’ When did you last complimenting your wife that she is beautiful? When the last time you told your men that he is handsome and you love him? You always fighting in your love relationship and think that there would be a miracle to reach your orgasms when making love. There is no miracle, love making is for the men and woman in love who are clean with the words they utter and smart with their behaviours at one another.

You can’t tell your wife that she is ugly like a baboon and expect a good love making after you mentioned those offensive words. Those harsh words dwell in her mind and they would turn her off every time you make love with her, even if you can apologize, they hardly get erased therefore better never than sorry. Let me advise you, don’t speak when you are angry, rather keep quiet because it’s very hard to fight with those harsh words once you have forgiven each other. Your mind would always recalling such words even during love making period and make your sex life nothing but a sham.  You would be then suspecting all kinds of medical issues with your bodies whereas it’s not but your unsettled love relationship.

Previously, I spoke about the bees of love that should collect sweet nectar from the relevant flowers. I am saying this once more that if you make your honey out of sour nectars, you won’t taste sugar in your love relationship. People of the world, when you are in love you should collect sweet words from your vocabulary. Let your vocabulary collect sweet words like a bee. By nature there is no bee that collects sour nectar, it’s always sweet. Feed your mind with sweet words, get rid of sour words to make a sweet honey and enjoy in your relationship, and enjoy, in your love making as well.

Tell you what, for the first time you utter offensive words to your partner, sweet words vocabulary runs out immediately and you would be left with none of those sweet words. If those sweet words vacate your mind dirty, harsh, and sour words take over to abuse your wife or husband.

If you are angry and feel like mentioning offensive to your partner, don’t even dare, try by all means not to utter it because that single, offensive, word is like a virus to destroy sweet words in your mind, and you find it easy to utter them with no shame.

I promise you won’t get enough erection to penetrate your women once your mind recalls swearing words that were spoken by your woman in front of her friends.

I am saying, lovemaking is like putting some more woods on the fire that is already blazing to become a strong furnace to enjoy food that is well cooked. Nevertheless, it doesn’t help to load some woods when there is no fire. It becomes very cold for the men and women who make love without love relationship.

Chapter 24.

Cloth of love:

Once a cloth of love that covered both of you when you first met is unveiled, you would see the true colours of a person. If the true colours of your husband is beating women, it would be seen clearly once that clothe of love is removed from the top of your heads. If true colours of your wife is shouting and swearing, you would be able to notice that once a clothed of love is nowhere to be found.

Do not allow such clothe of love that you have been wearing for years abandon your presence, you chose to wear it at the first time you met. Wear it with pride until death do you apart, they say. I just cannot figure out why death do people in love apart while they love each other so dearly. I love my husband and he loves me too therefore I cannot see death do us apart because we believe that even in heaven we will be still loving each other. Death is like a third person you should not allow to interfere with your love. Please, I urge all priests of the world that would say, ‘love and help each other until death do you apart.’ When they are presiding over the marriages between a man and woman in love. They should rather say, ‘Love one another and continue to keep the light shining even in heaven.’ How can you pronounce and blend two people in love to one flesh and in the same breath you also pronounce that death would do them apart? It doesn’t make any sense.

When a cloth of love in your relationship is becoming tattered, you would hear bitter words from the woman of her house that if it was not for the children she would have left long time ago. Those words are pronounced out of excruciating experiences from her heart while his man is abusing her. I always ask myself, what kind of a man is abusing a woman? Women are weak by nature, if you are deciding to hit her, where about you hit on her body because it’s always delicate and fragile. Men of the world you should know that all women’s body are fragile and care should be taken when they are handled. Hitting a woman implies that you are clumsy, your hands cannot handle fragile items.

I just want to give worldly men homework, fill up your tumbler with water, and place it on the saucer. Walk down the steps with normal pace. Once you have finished walking down the steps, check if water could not spilled from the tumbler. If there is no water spilled, it speaks a high volume that your care is optimum, you are able to take some precaution not to spill or break a tumbler. Your wife or girlfriend is like carrying a tumbler in a saucer filled with water while walking down or up the steps. Handling of a woman does not have a room of clumsy man.

Wear your cloth of love truthfully and faithfully before your eyes. You should know that it covers you against all the evils of the world. You are no longer belonging to the outside world of hooligans, gossipers, backstabbers, thieves, and killers.

Once you wear a cloth of love, you become humbled and soft at one another. The way you interact at each other changes dramatically. If you are a police officer and you are well known that you shout loud at the prisoners but when cloth of love covers you, your voice should automatically become low and soft when you are talking with your fellow love partner.

Wife and girlfriend do not take off that cloth of love at work or anywhere else because you know that your husband would not find out. Wear it truthfully and faithfully even in front of those men who are like starving leeches that eager devour you out of their evil lusts. Grounded woman wear such cloth with pride everywhere she goes to honour love relationship she maintains with her husband.

Husband and boyfriend wear a cloth of love even in the valleys of darkness where your wife or girlfriend cannot see because she is at home.

Commonly women wear a cloth of love honestly while their husbands and boyfriends perforate it with no shame. When it perforated, it cannot shelter you from the rains, cold, and scorching sun

Rain of various and perilous diseases come through the holes and cause havoc in your love relationship. Hot winds enters into your relationship to burn you alive when girls you have been dating fall pregnant and love atmosphere at home changes a great deal.

Keep a cloth of love around your bodies every day and keep it clean. This cloth of love is always white and clean. Precautionary measures should be taken into consideration not to cause stains onto such beautiful and valuable clothes. Stains of cheating should not be allowed to spoil your cloth of love because they leave indelible mark that resists even bleach.

I just want to list some factors that would keep your cloth of love clean and white:

  1. Man, compliment your woman everyday how much she is beautiful.
  2. Woman, love your man and give him all the respect he deserve at home.
  3. Man, make sure that a skirt of your woman suits her before she steps out of your house. Image painted when a skirt of your wife is not zipped up or her shirt is protruding through a unzipped opening in the back is not good. There will be many questions that would be left on the air about the relationship you maintain at home.
  4. Woman, please limit your words counts when addressing certain matters between you and your man. By nature, a woman would utter many words than a man, rain of words from your mouth would overwhelmed him and think you want to take control of him because he can’t respond with many words as you do. Yes, woman gets rid of her anger by many words she utters whereas a man portrays his anger by beating. Once a man has been bombarded with many that evokes his angers, he would start to say, ‘Hey, who do you talk like that?’ and you would say, ‘I am talking to you, are you deaf?’ ‘I am saying once more that you are not a man, you are just an imitation, what do you think my friends say if I carry around such old wreckage mobile phone? All my friends are using latest mobiles in the market. What about me? What about me?So called my ‘boyfriend’.’ What happen thereafter he then slaps you and your relationship becomes affected as a result.
  5. You should also listen to love music. Music is a powerful tool to change ones behaviours. If you always listening to love music, you would learn new tricks to master your love into the correct directions.
  6. Wake up early in the morning before the sunrise and jog along a sea beach, when a sun appears above the waves, stop and kiss each other. Come out of your house in the middle of night, grab your camp chairs and binoculars to watch shootings stars and the moon. I just can’t figure out if lovers become bored in their kitchens and lounge suit while nature is ready to be explored. Go to the mountains and grab your camping tent to enjoy your picnic somewhere out there and stop brawls.

Chapter 25.

The sweet words of your mouth:

People of the world, it is very good to be in love. If you love your man and he loves you too, you feel like you exist in Utopia where everything is perfect. Your heart melts away when he says, ‘Darling, tell you what, I love you, you complete my life entirely and I cannot imagine life without you, I love you and I will always love you.’ Those words are like cool mountain stream that meanders through your heart and mind. Such words move through the veins of your body to eliminate any illness in the blood of your body. Heart beats smoothly to supply rich blood around your body.

Hearing such words from the man you love so dearly make adrenal glands release adrenaline positively in such a way that you can wet yourself without being caressed or touched. Words that would make an adrenaline to send a signal to become fear and think of run away from your man should be avoided. I was in a taxi and I was next to a man in his 40’s. He took out his mobile phone and called his wife. I could see from the screen of his mobile phone that he was calling his wife as the number was personalised, ‘wife.’ When his wife picked up his call, he said:

“Hey! Is Thabo back from school?………………….., Good! Tell him to meet me at the bus station, parcels are too much for me to handle…………., I just want to find him at the station before I arrive……., Tell him to hasten up, I hate to wait for long in the sun.”

He then switched off his mobile phone and put it inside the pocket of his jacket. I became heartbroken of such words that lack a sense of romantic love they supposed to share. I tried to rephrase his words all over again to suit any other man and women that maintain a solid love relationship. I rephrased his words as follows:

‘Darling, how are you?………, I am fine except that I miss you, five hours while I was away from you is like 10 years really…….., Nice to hear that you are missing me as well but don’t worry I am about to get off at the bus station. Is Thabo back from school?………., Alright then, please tell him to meet me at the bus station to help me with the parcels, they are quite some and heavy………., ok! Take a good care, I cannot wait to see the apple of my eye……., Cheers!

They say time is money, you must make sure that never go a second without making it fruitfully. When you don’t use a time efficiently and effective, you would find it later that it was wasted for nothing while it couldn’t bear any good fruits for you.

Reaping good fruit in your relationship requires you to sow seeds of good fruit on time to your wife or husband as always.

First phrase I quoted, doesn’t sow any seeds of good fruit for the relationship shared between the man and woman in love. Such way of talking doesn’t add any value in your relationship to grow. Such words are so sour than a tartaric, they would make your wife frown and grin out of bitterness. She would age before time when you would be starting to notice wrinkles on her face resulting from frowning out of bitterness cohabiting into your relationship. These words, deteriorate illness in her body and she would die out of such diseases that would be avoided if care was taken to mention good words. Adrenalin that would circulate her body, would make some acids that would eat up all good oils that make body alive. Her mouth lips would become dry and pale to resist even vicks or zambok when applied.

Second phrase is rather more relevant to be mentioned to your fellow wife. Such good words are like medicine to cure any illness in the body of your wife. When you reach home, you would find your wife’s face reddens and alive. Such good words circulate adrenalin around your wife’s body to release natural oils of life. Those sweet they lay a strong foundation of your foreplay to shoot a rocket up in the sky before making love. Your wife’s cheeks become exuberant and sparkling like a shiny little star in the sky. Her lips won’t need any substances to heal cracks because her body would supply its own natural oils to heal if a man of the house is talking sweet words as always.

Men of the world, do you remember making some first advances to that woman before your eyes? Yeah! I am sure you remember very vividly, Tell you what, making those advances do not stop,continue to make such advances every day. Don’t say, ‘She mine now, I even put a ring on her finger, I find no reason to plead with her anymore.’

If you love your woman, you always organize dates with her as it was in the first time you met. You would agree with me that many men make some advances to women because they want to make love to those certain women. Yes, even if that woman is now your wife you should plead with her using your various colours of a leopard. A leopard is managing to eat out if its colours. No colour, no food.

Volume of sweet words I first listened to when we met should increase as we proceed with our journey. Don’t take me to the famous restaurants, lodges, and hotels to convince me to love you when you were treating me like your queen. Once I conceded to your advances and requests, paint is changing from its container when a special treatment is vanishing like dews meet the sun rays.

Chapter 26.

Don’t stay when there is no love:

It becomes so sad when you are noticing your love relationship lose its power along the way. You would notice such down fall of love once your husband or boyfriend is losing interest on you.

Frustration are running through your mind and ask yourself many unanswered questions when your husband is no longer coming home or your boyfriend is avoid your presence.

His disregards towards you is causing you a lot of stress and sleepless at night, trying to figure out what you have done to deserve such ordeal in your life.

It rubs salt to your wound when you get know that your man was seen at the local park sauntering hand in hand with a certain lady. It also rubs salt to the wound when he walk out on you to answer his private calls outside of the house leaving you behind puzzled.

His attitude towards you changes a great deal when you enquire about his calls he answers furtively.

You cannot resist a temptation to sneak and take his mobile phone while he is asleep to find out where his behaviours are emanating from. Shock strikes you at its full swing when you discover romantic text messages between him and another woman.

You wake him up and ask him, ‘Can you explain what is this?’ he says, ‘Give back my mobile phone!’ Tears well up your eyes and ask him once more, ‘Why are doing this to me?’ He responds, ‘You found what you have been looking for, therefore stop getting under my skin, I need to sleep.’

Whole world come crumbles into pieces before your eyes. You do what it takes to save your relationship by calling such new woman in his life. You tell her to go down the street and look for another man because the one she is in to, belongs to you. It tears your heart apart when your man takes sides with her against you.

Your tears wet up bed cushions and become drenched as if it was raining. You call your mother and cry to her, she gives you some hopes to standstill and assures you that things would work out between the two of you.

I am a Zulu woman and our culture stresses that a woman should be patient with her husband no matter any difficulties she is experiencing in her marriage because that what it is all about. Woman is deemed to be taught by the elders related to her before she gets married about how to maintain herself in the marriage.

When your man is mistreating you one way or the other, you would seek advises from the elders again and they would advise you to be patient. You would hang on there until he gouges your eyes out the sockets because you are abiding by their teachings.

People of the word, I started this blog to encourage people to love one another because it very good to be in love but you cannot run a risk of losing your life because of such teachings. I advise all women who are experiencing such situation to leave, do not expect for the worse. Remember there are many women that lost their lives while they were expecting miracles in vain to cure such ordeals when they occur in their marriages or love relationship.

People of the world, I only know perishable products that expire with time not love. When indications prove itself that love has been depleted, please find no reason to restore it, just leave. Life is very short to wail day and night while someone is waiting for you with loads of love. I know you love him so much but it is of no use because you are hurting yourself in the process. You are putting yourself under severe stress for nothing. Earth boundaries do not limit itself to him as he is abusing you. If he does not want to settle with you in the South hemisphere, please go North and you won’t regret it. Northern part of the world is waiting for you.

People of the world, life was meant to be enjoyed because it comes once they is no spare. Love complement life to be more enjoyable. I am not saying if you are single you cannot enjoy life but I have been noticing homes of people who are living alone, they are literally cold.

People of the world a home with a man and woman in love is very warm. Have you ever seen a man that is flying solo in his life, crease of his pair of trouser become doubled or tripled when it supposed to be single. His dishes are rotten in the sink fraught with maggot and cockroaches that are crawling as they please.  Let me help you as God created me for that reason. Usually, you won’t recognize the importance of something while still rest with your hands, you would recognize it once it is gone. Recognize my presence in your life because I am ready to assist you with anything you need.

I was saying life was meant to be enjoyed because it comes once. Frustrating yourself with someone who mistreats you, would steal your time to be happy somewhere else. Time and tides waits for no man. Being patient in the abusive love relationship is a syndrome of your own destruction. Get out before it is too late.

Men who are abusing their female love partners, I regard them as selfish or conceited. I mean they are depriving their love partners opportunity to be happy in life. Alright! You know that life comes once but you make my life hell for days yet time is not on my side to be happy. When he made you cry for two minute, you should know that your two minute to enjoy life would never be recovered until you die because time waits for no man.

Ephesians 4:26 says: Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry. God knew that life is short therefore you should make every second count when you are both happy. You selfish man! You want me to spend days crying, tell me how are you going to reimburse those days that went down a drain to me again? Listen! This ends here, I cannot live like this for my entire life, and I leave you for good. You cannot live by beatings throughout your life.

It is very important to respect one another in the love relationship and live peacefully. Only cats would scratch at each other not human beings especially in the love relationship.

I am going to mention something that I am not intending to make ladies to pay revenges towards their men. Someone asked me that a lion can’t run but why it’s capable to catch its prey? He said a lion growl is very loud and scary to make its prey shivers with terror and catch while it’s still in winter. A single lion can growl to make a large herd of buffalos to run away and it also get a chance to jump onto its prey and devour it.

I just want to tell you a story that there was a lady who was fed up by her husband as he was abusing her day and night. Her husband used to beat her every day. Some day her husband flogged her again. She said, ‘My husband, you always take pleasure to beat me as you please, do you know that I am not scared of you, it’s that I am respecting you.’ Her husband became more furious and said, ‘What!………..’ she then said, ‘Yes, I am not scared you, let’s go out in the yard, I just want to show you that I can do the beating more than you do.’ Her husband went outside to the yard and she also came out to fight with him. Her husband flung his fist towards her, she dived down and grasped him around his waist and flung him heavily on the ground. She said, ‘get up! I am tired of you.’ Her husband got up and rushed towards her, aiming to slap her. She dived again and her husband missed to slap her face. She again grasped his waist and flung him heavily on the ground. She said, ‘Get up!’ but her husband couldn’t get up again. She then sat upon him while he was groaning on the ground. She slapped his face a great deal. She asked him sarcastically, ‘Can you also feel how hurtful to be beaten?’ He cried very loud and said, ‘Forgive me! Forgive me! I won’t do it again! From that day he respected her and refrained to hit her.

People of the world I am not saying women should beat their men as well but I am trying to stress a point of respect at each other in the love relationship and don’t expect for the worse, just leave before it’s too late. No one deserves beatings. We say in Zulu language, ‘Indukuayakhi.’ That means beatings doesn’t construct. You are not in the position to punish any human being because I believe it’s only God who punishes His people for their wrong doings. If you beat me as always for my wrong doings, who beats for your own flaws? Who you to judge?

There was a woman that committed adultery. Pharisees brought that woman to Jesus to seek His advises whether kill a woman by stones as per the law of Moses that if a person found cheating should be stoned to death. Jesus said, “If there is none of you who doesn’t err, should start to throw stones at her.’ They looked at each other and they put stones down, and left. Please read John 8.

1 John 1:8 says that if we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. Now, who you to judge me by my wrong doings to beat me up. I believe if you were among the crowd that brought a woman committed adultery to Jesus, you would be the first to throw a stone because you think that you don’t do mistake.

I just want to through a challenge to the parents of the world not to beat their children. When you are beating your child, you plant wrong seed into the mind of your child. Your child would grow up knowing that beating a person is justifiable when he/she err.

Chapter 27.

Is love a gambling machine?:

One day I took a taxi and I overheard a conversation between a gentleman and a lady that were seating behind me. A conversation ignited while a taxi was passing by the street hookers as we were leaving for my hometown from Durban.

A lady said, ‘Phew! I always wonder why these people are doing such horrible behaviour, why they do not just look for the decent jobs rather than peddling their assets in the street? It’s disgusting.”

A gentlemen responded to her, “Jobs are very scarce these days………..”

“Even if it that so, they should not resolve to promiscuity as business, body of a human being is a temple for God, it should not be spoiled by such behaviour.”

“Do you think they spoil their bodies with such business of theirs?”

“Yes! What do you think; these people are destined to be burnt in hell……..”

“I think you are missing a point……”

“What point? Are you supporting them? Men are dirty, maybe you also buy from them, Ha! Ha! Ha!…”

“No, listen! I am neither supporting nor buying from them, but let me ask you a question, do you have a boyfriend?”

“Yes, I do and he is not my boyfriend, he is my fiancé because we are about to get married…..”

“Alright! Tell me about the time you met, what was he used to do for you, I mean to show his love towards you?”

“What he used to do?…. (She snarled her mouth sarcastically at him) what do you mean?”

“I mean his special treatment towards you just to spoil you a little bit.”

“Ah! Of course he treats me like a queen ever since we met.”

“Be specific, what kind of special treatment you have been receiving from him ever since?”

“Ah! My fiancé knows that I am not working, I mean he buys me some clothes, shoes, he also make sure that my head is done twice a week. I mean, he does everything for me because he loves me and I love him as well.”

“That’s good, I mean, that’s how love is all about, but tell me what are you doing in return.”

“Nothing! I only cook for him and wash his clothes.”

“I don’t think he approached you and does everything for you just merely to wash and ironing for him! Tell me. Do you have any kids?”

“Nope, we are planning to have them once we get married because we don’t want any illegitimate children that would peddle their assets like those hookers we saw along the street.”

“You got many stories, do you think those people are doing such business because were born illegitimate?”

“Yeah! What do you want me to say?”

“Alright! You don’t have any kids but do you make love?”

“Yes of course, Ha! Ha! Ha! Love couples make love, so do we.”

“So do you?”

“Yes, a lot”

“Now tell me where do you draw a line between you and a slut?”

“What!…..are you insulting me?

“No, I am not insulting you, I am just asking what differentiate you from those hookers we saw along the street as we were departing from the city?

“What do you mean! Are you associating me with those smelling sluts?”

“Tell you what, even those sluts are better off than any woman in the love relationship. If your fiancé has been giving you some special treatment, do you imagine how much he spent to spoil you. When a crave attacks a man, he would go and buy those sluts only to find that he spends just few dollars to satiate his desires. If he has to buy you some new clothes, new mobile phones, and new cars, finally you would reciprocate by opening legs for him.”

“But that doesn’t make me a hooker and I don’t hang around the streets peddling my assets. My assets belongs to my man only not for everyone.”

“Yes, all women in love relationship either married or not are the biggest sluts of all time. I am not married as yet, I have a girlfriend, if she has to visit me in my flat, I have to buy chocolates and pizza to bribe her to open legs for me.”

“She is a stupid if she can open legs for you just for the chocolates and pizzas. What are you planning about your relationship? Why don’t you just get married if you love each other?”

“Not all people wish to get married, I mean we have never discussed such matters.”

“You may rather say people like you who don’t want to take their love relationship to the next levels are the prostitute not people who are married or about to get married like me and my fiancé.”

No! The whole world is a prostitution arena either married or not. Do you know that there are some women that maintain multiple love relationships with different men to receive a variety of special treatment from those men they love. They even label those men as ministers. There is a minister of finance, minister of housing, and minister of transport. Those women are not better off than street hookers, I mean they are worse than them.”

“Those women are so into material things, they have no directions other than play games as sluts that you are talking about not anybody else who is married and own a family.”

“Even if you are married, your husband would be still buying you some beautiful birthday presents or a car. How would you return a favor other than opening legs for him, hence you are still the same with a street hooker?”


“I mean those gifts he buys for you, he buys you to open legs for him.”

“So in that manner, am I a slut?”

“Yes you are a slut but behind the scene, I mean where do you draw the line between you and hookers? What makes a difference is that you don’t hang around in the street, nonetheless you are similar.” Do you know that married men are the ones who buy from the hooker?”

“What is the motive behind their actions to sleep with those skunks?”

“If your husband no longer treats like a queen by spoiling you one way or the other, you would switch him off to make love with you and he would resolve to the street hookers and buy them.”

“It’s not like that, when a man is bored to make love to his wife, he resolve to those skunks and bring back all hordes of diseases to kill their wives.”

“Tell you what, do you know that making love with hookers is more safer than any other woman you meet and fall in love with.”

“I could tell that you buy from them as well…”

“No I do not buy from them but I heard that they make sure that they practice safe sex as they deal with many men. Some another women out there they change men like their socks while they fail to keep them safe as hookers do.”

“Communication plays a critical role when a man and woman love each other. If I am no longer satisfying you, put such matter on the table to be resolved. Heading your to the street hookers is not a solution.”

“Yes, You suppose to mention those point not to judge them.”

“But these are the different both of worlds of which theirs is very difficult to fathom. I believe that making love and hold one another result from the love relationship that laid a strong foundation.”

“A man put his sexual craving at first before love. He can do everything out of his cravings to spoil you by the special treatments that are outside of this world. It would be reflected as love in your eyes but it’s actually not. You would realize later when he left you and once he is satiated and he would go down the street to hold a slut close to his chest just only to ejaculate not love.”


I don’t know what would be your take on the above dialogue I overheard between the two passengers. Love couples that do not have any intentions to start a family out of their relationship, they date. Dating normally comprises of conditional love. If you no longer taking me to dine out, then our love is over. If you can’t buy me a recent mobile phone of a respected brand name, I leave you for another man that would afford me.

It takes two to tango in the love relationship. Love shouldn’t be a gambling arena to benefit out of it. If you want to gamble and get some money, play a lotto or any competition not love. Go to horse racing and bet to win loads of cash and buy yourself clothes and earrings. Go to casino and play those flashing gambling machine to win a lot of money and maintain yourself but not in the love relationship.

Chapter 28.


Dealing with death in your love relationship:


Wail until your eyes are dry my love…

Gone are the days, we are apart my love,

It was great on earth, when we were growing loving each other,

Today I live with another country,

Do not cry or bother, you cannot come,

And the heart has been forgiven and forgotten,

I went to sleep to the cold worlds, but I do not feel pain.

Keep well my love.



Life becomes beautiful when a man and woman in love relationship love each other so dearly. Committing your hearts at each other complements your relationship to grow even stronger. You make sure that, you treasure each an every second spent together. Healthy love relationship existing between the two of you, makes you cannot get over each other. You live life like it’s golden.

There is nothing that tears your heart apart than to lose your spouse through death, your whole world crumbles before your eyes. Death is natural and it ends your love relationship suddenly and unaware. We don’t have a control over deaths but it’s a perilous thief that steals away our loved ones.

It is very important to spend a good quality time with your love partner without problems to leave good memories when you die. Don’t make your love partner sigh with relief when you die because you have been abusing him or her.

When you have been loving and respecting your partner, good memories would be left behind. You should not make your soul mates to be thankful and applaud in her/his heart that you have passed on. “Oh! What a sigh of relief, he is dead, thanks God!” Such remarks would emerge if you have been mistreating your wife or girlfriend in such a way that he/she wouldn’t grieve if you are dead.

Leave a good impression behind so that you would be remembered in her/his heart. Make your love partner scroll those pictures you captured when you were having holiday somewhere out there. Do not make your partner to burn those pictures into ashes because you have been abusing her or him during your life time.

You should make sure that your partner would be crying and wailing when you are gone. Let your actions speak volume when you are passed on. Make him or her shed a tear of sorrow and joy because you have been good to him or her.

Life becomes bliss when a man and woman are in love for each other but death comes as a thief to steal what is treasured in the heart. I hope you all know that, things we treasured a most in life, are the ones that we lose to easily. Life is like that. When you bought a new car and you fall in love with it, sometime later – it overturns beyond repairs. You buy a new mobile phone and you fall in love with it, suddenly, you drop it accidentally and crack it beyond repairs. Your heart becomes sorrowful and sad for that matter if you lost what was treasured into it. A solution to this matter is to let it go and accept things you cannot change.

When you lose something important in life do not ask yourself a question: Why? Why he/she has to die? Life was meant to adapt what is offered by it. When winter sets in, wear a coat. When summer sets in as well, take off that coat and wear skimpily.

If you cannot adapt to the life’s times and tides, you would commit a suicide. When life is testing you and ask yourself, “Why me? It means you are not qualified to live on this earth.  This earth calls for people who are able to pick up the pieces and move on.  I am talking about the people who are able to accept thing they cannot change.

If your love partner is passed on, give yourself a time to cry out loudly. If a dam is full to its capacity, water would escape through holes that were measured to let water out once it reaches a set maximum. If a damn doesn’t have such water escapes, it would burst. Do not avoid tears just cry because your pains have reached a maximum that your body system cannot take, therefore cry and cry.

Get yourself a chance to spend last moments with him or her before she or he is buried. Get a chance to cry all your eyes out for somebody you have been loved so dearly.   Your heart would forgive but not forget your soul mate.   If you are limiting yourself time to cry, you will find it hard to accept and suffer severe stress. Stress is syndrome of all sorts of illness in the body that would cost your life in the end.

If you find it hard to spend time all by yourself. Get yourself time to mingle with other people and friends up until you are strong enough to be on your own.   Get time to miss your loved ones by watching those special moments you captured together through videos or pictures to heal your heart and soul.

Vacant space would be felt when you are having breakfast, dinner or supper. Waking up in the middle of the night and try to hold him or her in vain is so sad when you are realising that he/she is not there.   Go to his/her tombstone and bring all of your annals you captured when he/she was still alive. Talk to him/her as if he/she is present, that would facilitate a heart and emotions healing processes.

Once you are recovered, onus is upon you to decide whether to begin another relationship or not. Personally, I do not recommend any love affair after when your love partner has passed on.  I believe that, you would honour your passed on love partner if you do not start any relationship up until your last breath.

Vows that you took before a presiding priest over your marriage, was to love one another until death do you apart. There are no vows that say if death does you apart, survived partner should be free to enter another new relationship.

I believe that, once a person is involved with another person, that should not be altered until death do them apart whether married or not. Involving yourself with another person, it means you share your bloods together. Your bodies systems get used for each other. If a human being is growing up, he/she would contract various diseases depending how his/her body system can fend off such illnesses.

I believe that people should not switch love partners because bloods of human beings are not the same in terms of diseases and so on.  I believe there would be no such a high number of venereal diseases if people were have to stick to their love partners even after death.  I know my Zulu culture allows a brother of a deceased to take over a love relationship so that a wife of the deceased would not leave for other men.

I know many people who died out of such behaviour where a brother of a deceased would take over a love relationship without scrutinising a cause of death – of her husband. A disease that killed her husband would be again transmitted to his brother – to kill him as well. The whole family would be massacred by a single disease while trying to stop a wife of the deceased from looking elsewhere.

I am trying to stress a point that human being suppose not to exchange love partners because systems of their bodies are not the same. Be faithful to your love partner even if he/she is no more.

Chapter 29.

Meaning of love:

It is very important to know the meaning of love before you enter into any love relationship. Many people have just lost a meaning of love these days. Some other people they put careers and money before love. Some other people fail to keep the love light shining after a while they live together.

You lost a true meaning of love if no longer calling each other; Dear, Sweetheart, and Darling to draw ones attention romantically. Calling each by those words motivates your hearts and mind not to forget a love mission. Those words works like a charm, they make ones heart jolly as ever.

Please, consider these following conversations between a husband and his wife:

  • “Darling! Did you see my jug port?” he asked.

“It’s downstairs on the coffee table, Dear.” She responded.

  • “Where is my jug port?” he asked.

“It’s downstairs, on the coffee table.” She responded.

If you compare these conversations stated above you would notice that, conversation number 1 is sweet and straight to the point about what made them brought together. Meaning of love is clear to their hearts and minds. Such words are life, they make blood flow and circulate every corner of your body.

These words should be said meaningfully, they should not be conveyed in vain. These words heal whatever cut that might be starting to show in your love affair.

These words, should be your daily bread. Say it more all over again to your love partner. Say them with pride and joy. Do not say them to blackmail your love partner to gain something. Say them meaningfully.

Conversation, number 2 is cold as death if it is exchanged between the two people in the love relationship.

There are many people who are lamenting over their relationships that are not working out whereas they called upon themselves such menace if they cannot address each other romantically when calling each other. You are so sad that your marriage is on the brim to finish, but you are failing to call your love partner: Sweetheart, Darling, Dear, and Honey.

There are many men who hardly utter any romantic words to their love partners, who also lament that they suffer impotence when they make love, but such impotence disappears when they make love with other women of their choice, that they would be able to pronounce sweet love words to them.

People of the world, I have seen many people who lost true meaning of love along the way. You would notice that love has finished in their hearts, they only live together because they are married. It is sad to hear a wife says, “I am only staying for my children, if it was not for them, I would have gone long time ago.”

There is a question that I just want to pose to every man that is reading. If you meet a woman of your choice and tell her that you love her, what doesn’t that mean if you fail to support her and love as the time moves on?

There are some men out there who are abusing their wives daily. Such men are aware that their wives are not working but they hardly buy them some clothes. Their wives should bow and praise them before those men can offer a support.

I know a certain retired man that is hardly support his wife although having enough money to look after his wife. This man is having a shelter to sleep at night because his wife tried by all means to construct their home. He does not have any of the houses that he built from his capabilities. He does not contribute to anything at his house but he runs amok whenever he doesn’t get breakfast, dinner and supper. He abuses his wife, he make her toil in the field no matter how sick is she.

This man has spent all his life in the city where he was working. When he retired from his work, he only came with a bag and bought a single bed. He found himself a house to live in, that he could not have contributed a cent to construct it, but he nestled himself inside without a shame.

This man is literally rich, but it boggles the mind why he does not support his wife to live a happy life together. I once asked his wife about such behaviour of her husband, she told me in the outset everything went smooth up until they get married when he started to beat her up. He hardly supports his family ever since hence she and her children were living off the fields when they would grow some fresh produce. It was once in a blue moon when he would send some cash to support a family.

This strong woman said that she could not leave him because with Zulu culture it is a disgrace when a married woman gives up on her marriage. You would hold on to your marriage no matter how bad your husband treats you.

Her husband is a fan of a sorghum beer that she would always prepare for him. This man, he only buys a mixture to concoct a sorghum beer for him to drink. He does not buy any clothing for his wife while he knows she never work before, she was only a house wife while he was in the city. This man does not pay any attention when his wife is sick. He does not even give her some cash to consult a doctor.  He does not even visit her in the hospital.

This kind of relationship has lost its taste. This is not love that made them to live together, they are living like strangers. This man supposed to treasure every moment with his wife since he seldom came at home when he was working away. Life comes once and it has to be enjoyed while it still lasts. He supposed to use his monies to enjoy themselves at their old age.

You would only see such incidence when love has lost its meaning. A question is why you are inviting a person into your life if you do not love her and treat – her like a trash.

How to cure love that has lost its focus?:

  • When you are in the love relationship, it’s always takes two to tango. There is no a room of being selfish or conceited in the love relationship. Everything you do is always based on the mutual agreement between the two of you.
  • Assisting one another to tackle any hindrance in your love relationship. Do not sit back and relaxing while your fellow love partner is drowning into the deep waters of problems while you can offer a helping hand.
  • Do not borrow some loan without your love partner being aware.
  • Don not change house curtains without informing your husband when there is no any intention to surprise him.
  • There is nothing more than compromising in the love relationship. Both man and woman should always reach mutual consensus to avoid different opinions based on individual decision to do things. Avoid acting on your own decisions without involving your love partner. If you decide to renovate a house, inform your love partner and agree each other.

Clean your love affair, white:

  • You should work both hand in hand to remove what seems to cause a stain into your love relationship. Love is for the people who are smart and clean. Love is for the people who are careful about it. Love is not for the people who are clumsy and carelessness. Attaining clean and white love affair begins with loving yourself. Do you polish your shoes? Do you brush your teeth? Do you wash your clothes? Do you iron your clothes? Do you wash the dishes? Do you sweep the floor? Do you carry a handkerchief to clean your nose? Do you talk sense?

If your answer is: No, to these questions asked above, it would be unlikely to attain a clean love affair with partner. I think before you enter into any love relationship, you should start by look at the each other and determine how far she or he loves himself or herself.  I believe there would no incidence where love is handled badly.

I believe clumsy and careless person is reckless towards almost everything he or she touches. Clean and smart person would make sure that dirt is not found near a love relationship they share.

Kiss and hold each other:

  • When is the last time you kissed each other? Why you find it so hard to kiss your wife at home or town? Why you are so ashamed to hold your love partner’s hand when you walk on the pavement?

Go to the river or sea and swim:

  • Take off your clothes and swim together, familiarise yourselves with your bodies. Take a good quality time to study yourselves while you are nude and praise your wife for her breasts, bums and legs. Take some photos while you are still swimming and keep them to your romantic records.
  • It’s quite frustrating that there are some love partners that do not know how their bodies are structured. They only know themselves if they are under the blankets while it’s dark.

Chase away strangers from you:

  • When a true meaning of love is lost, it leaves behind strangers in your house. You are no longer love partners but strangers.
  • When you allow a spirit of romantic love affair to leave you, love gets vanish with all traits it possesses to make the both of you happy.
  • Keep the spirit of love hangs in the atmosphere of your hearts for as long as you live.
  • Good spirit of love leaves your presence if you:-
  • Cheat on your love partner.
  • Beat your love partner.
  • Swear at your wife or husband.
  • Do not kiss at each other.
  • Do not address one another romantically if you call one attention.
  • Talk behind your love partner’s back.
  • Do not respect your love partner.
  • Do not make love.
  • Do not hold one another.
  • A stranger would run away between the two of you if shun away from what I mentioned above.
  • Love brought you together therefore stick with it throughout your lives.

Chapter 30.

Love, lies, secrets, deceiving and bleeding:

Biggest lie of all times in the love relationship is found in the bible: Genesis 3, where a snake deceives Eva to eat a fruit from the tree that was in the middle of garden. Eva was tempted to eat it and she gave it to her husband Adam to eat it as well. Punishment was very excruciating to them when God found out about what they had done. Snake was cursed to crawl, Eva was cursed to feel great pains when she gives birth and Adam was cursed to toil while earth will produces sharp thorns to prickle him throughout his life.

Truth would set you free, they say. Many people chose to lie on many occasions to set them free. A person would choose to lie when he want to avoid certain unpleasant situation. Lies are very sweet and cool but truth is always bitter.

Truth and lies have left many people dead in the love relationship when a can of worms opened. There are many people who keep their lies up until they die. There are many people who kept their lies undisclosed to save their marriages or relationships from termination. I know a certain lady who keeps a secret that she got two children from the previous relationships to her husband. Poor man led her to the altar knowing that his lady does not have any children. I am scared what would happen if her man finds out.

Infidelities are common in marriages that make a married woman to have children that do not belong to her husband. I believe anyone can run amok if he finds out that he does not belong to the father his mother married. This is the secret a person would choose to go six feet underground with it unless a can of worm would open to cause a lot of hassle.

Some men would lie about their age to appear older than a woman that is older than him.  Some men would lie about their age to avoid age gaps between him and her. He would hide any documentation that reveals his age in his house unless a can of worm would open when she finds out that she fell in love with a sugar daddy. She can leave him for good if she finds out that her boyfriend is old as mountains. If that man is interested enough to a younger lady, he would make her pregnant with many children to avoid her running away after she finds out. When a cat comes out of the bag, she would find it difficult to go when he even promise to lead her to the altar while having five children at the same time.

I heard that some people hide in the outset of their relationship that they are sick from HIV/AIDS from their new love partners. There are many people who are infected with such perilous disease when their partners could not able to disclose their status to them. It confuses that, what kind of love is that if you cannot protect your love partner from something you know that it’s dangerous. Those people, who cannot disclose their HIV/AIDS status to their love partner, are not different from the merciless murderers who should be charged in the court of law. Such lies are excruciating when a fellow love partner becomes sick and die in the name of love.

It utmost important to leave no stones unturned about yourself when you enter a new love relationship. Don’t lie because your lies can go a long way to cause havoc in somebody else’s life.

There was a man that his girlfriend has been hiding from him that she is on treatment for HIV/AIDS disease. Such man asked her to go for an HIV/AIDS testing before engaging themselves to love making. She agreed and they went to the clinic. They took turns to have some testing done on them while one is outside. When they got home, they reveal to each other those results. Both results were negative. They started to engage themselves to love making for a long time without a protection because they were willing to have a baby.

One day a man was shocked immensely when saw her medical records detailing that she was on the treatment for HIV/AIDS for a long time. They fought and break up. A man became very sad and angry over her. He continued to have many multiple relationships out of anger. He would sleep with many women without using protections to spread a disease.

After three years of his behaviour, he decided to have HIV/AIDS check done on him. He could not believe when his results returned negative. He started to act responsible and finally he got a lover of his life and they had children. Apparently his mistress colluded with a medical professional to give her negative HIV/AIDS results.

Tell your new man in your life that you have children from previous relationship. Leave it to his discretion to decide whether to continue or not. It’s so alarming that there are some women who convince their children to call them sisters whenever their men are around.  Imagine how difficult for those children to be forced to call their mother:  sisters.

I believe that if a person knows about love, he would love you despite any mistakes you had done before you meet him. We are the human beings and we do err at some point in life.

Some women fake orgasms to entertain their men. You should talk about your sex life for the benefit of the both – of you. Living your life to make only him happy makes you an object or a doll not a love partner.

Some men as well use certain tablets to increase their stamina where it’s not there. Faking your erection does not show the love for her. Love only is the biggest tablet to boost your stamina. I believe if you love your women so dearly, you would not need such drugs. Some men out there are representing vibrators when love is gone from their minds.

It’s quite frustrating to find out that you are enjoying love making because he uses some drugs to man him up. Canvas is a part and parcel of wagon. Once wagon is gone, it’s taking along its sail to cover other people onboard. When love is gone stamina flies away as well. There is no reason to lie or deceive. Sit down and resolve what seems to be a trouble between the two of you.

Lies are not beneficial when comes to love relationship. Talking lies may set you free, but they would also make you to lead an unhappy life. Your self-conscience that you lied to avoid a certain situation can give you sleepless at night.

Wearing artificial hips and bums to look bootylicious, would be a turn off to your man when finds out that your looks were façade.  Wearing fake bulging vagina can make many drooling when you are wearing tight jeans but it would leave him disappointed if he finds out the truth behind.

Tell your girlfriend in the outset that you do not have some teeth you only wear some false teeth. Do not wait until she finds out by herself when you accidentally dropped them on the floor.

Telling the truth every time strengthen your relationship to survive many storms and floods along the way. Lying is very detrimental to any love relationship. Lies weaken you love affair to become frail and eventually it becomes tattered perforated by lying.

Speak the truth despite how inanimate incidence can be. I always say, lies are like a drug because once you have just started telling them, they become habitual like smoking or binging on alcohol.

Your issues might not be an open book to the public, but please! Just open your book from first page up until the last one to your love partner. Open it slowly without skipping any pages because that would constitute untrustworthiness to yourself, love partner and your relationship.

There are many love relationships that were terminated because of lying. There are many relationships that are on the brim to finish because of lies that were spoken in the outset of love affair. Many people have died as well by not being honest in the first place when they fell in love.

Do you know that if you lied or having a crucial secret not told, it would be hard for you to pass on when angel of death is visiting you.  You could be critically ill or injured to be confirmed dead but your soul denies escape up until truth is told.  You would find a person in that precarious situation of dying in such a manner that any other person could have passed on, but he still wish to confess before he kick the bucket. “Please, convene my husband I need to confide so that I can die.” This is not cool when any one is ready to go but lies and secretes pull her legs backwards.

It is vital important to be honest in almost everything no matter how small a thing is. When your wife calls you on your mobile while driving to ask your whereabouts, tell her exactly where you are. Do not give wrong places to deceive her – to cover your mischievous actions. Do not say, I am about to enter home main gate, while you are miles away.

Lies ignite themselves and develop into a wild fire you cannot stop. Lies lead to cheating. Talking lies at home trains you to become an expert to camouflage anything and everything. If lies can be eliminated, cheating can be halted as well. Lies should be controlled at home. Yes or No answers should be said based on the truth when asked about anything.

“Did you brush your teeth, Dear?”

“Yes I did Hun, and you?”

“I am brushing them as we speak, my Love.”

Honesty for such petty talks avoids lies to outbreak like a pandemic to cause havoc into your relationship. Do not lie that you brushed your teeth while you never touched them. You would feel pleased and comfortable when you spoke lies, but they are detrimental to your life when your teeth become rotten, detrimental to your love partner and your love affair.

Chapter 31.

Love constitution:

Do you know heaven? You will say, heaven is seen by the dead. I have good news for you that – you can live in heaven while you are still on earth. I am Mrs. T.H Gcaba and I live in heaven. The heaven that I am talking about is love. I love my husband and he loves me too therefore we both cohabit in the heaven of love. We are not dead, we are alive and kicking but we live in our own heaven of love.

Earth in the outside of our heaven is fraught of lies, gossiping, cheating, backstabbing, killings, you name them. Such awful incidences, they have no room into our heaven of love.

God is love and he made His own heaven where He lives. We heard in the bible that people who will see heaven are those who will be found sinless and flawless. Why flawless? Because heaven is a place where it cannot take any filth.

Some places are regulated by certain principles and regulations that which people should comply whenever they come to contact with those places. Bible was resulted to give clarity and guidance – to people that should follow if they want to enter a holy place where God is. I hope you are aware of those teachings.

Schools, hospitals, prisons etc. They do have their own policies that are written down for any to comply when they visit such places. Those principles were made to protect and maintain a place mission uncompromised.

Two couple in love should draft their own romantic bible. There are some countries where marriages are controlled by the state where you get a marriage certificate after been married. Do you know, why? It is the state major priority to maintain peace among the citizen of the country. State realized that riots are very common in the love relationships hence they interfered. Divorcing involves attorneys and the state when arguments erupt over who must live with children, what assets that should be given to who, attorneys and the state would intervene as a result.

I just cannot understand why state has to interfere with love affair of two people who fell in love for each other. I believe if lovers of the world were able to master their love affair to the correct directions, they would be no state interference.

Let’s write our own script of love:


  • Scribbling your script of love, requires hearts in love to wed to live in heaven of love:

Even marriage is unnecessary when two people love one another. In life, I have discovered that people look for love and do whatever it takes just to get married. They just want to get married because of status – of being married to wear those expensive rings and wedding dresses but love is not there, what follows is that they divorce with two month been married.

Why we have to prove to someone that we love each and death would do us apart. Marriage is unnecessary if couples love each other and commit their hearts only, to love one another until death do them apart. I mentioned earlier on that I don’t know why people keep on saying that death would do them apart if they love each other. Me and my husband we love each other and death won’t do us apart because even in heaven, we will continue to keep our love light shining.

Vouching in front of a clergy man that you love each other is unnecessary because some people use marriages to chain up their partners like dogs. If a jobless man make some advances to a lady that couldn’t impressed him but because she is doctor, he would resolve to lead to the altar just to put a chain around her neck to support him. This how and where the state intervenes when there is no love if a man wish to divorce her because he would benefit from the assets owned between them. Heart cannot be bought by money, it shows true colours unexpectedly. What a waste of time and energy when the whole world of your marriage crumbles into pieces when it was not love orientated but money.

The day marriages are eliminated, it would be a day where people would love each other honesty. Marriages are nothing except showing off where love is nowhere to be found. Ring on your finger does not show love, but the heart. Many people look at their fingers with no ring while aging and decide to get married despite having love partner of their hearts choices as long he put a ring on her finger, case is closed.

I was saying onus is upon you to create your own bible for your heaven of love. Create your own principles and regulations before a state and religion can take over your relationship. Don’t allow your love relationship to be handled by the aliens.

Your love affair is heaven that belongs to you two. Drafting of the bible of your heavenly love should be romantic and cannot be compared to any frigid laws of the state or religion.

Drafting of such bible, does not mean that you would have to get a pen and the paper. Two hearts in love,constitute a lifetime scripture.  As soon as you fall in love at each other, a scripture is compiled by love in the hearts. If you look each other intently at your eyes, you would see a message conveyed by the hearts written in your eyes that swear to commit one another for everlasting time.

If you fell in love, experience such things happening by spending good quality time with your partner, feel ones heart. When you hold each other for the first time you fell in love, you would feel that your heart is busy writing some scriptures of commitment. True love would make you even to pronounce those words written.

Do not hold back those words in your heart just say it because are due. Words written by the hearts in love are so powerful and can evoke some emotions. When you feel like crying, do cry those tears of love.

Hearts commitments supersede those vows you would swear in front of a priest. Healthy love would not be caused by tying a knot in front of a priest. Make your hearts get married first and a priest should bless your love relationship. Your wedding should be a blessing ceremony to bless your relationship not to commit yourselves to love one another as if you are forced to do so.

Hearts marriage without audiences and a priest supersedes all known marriages. Hearts wedding begin when you meet your love of your life. Wedding at the church is nothing and useless if your hearts failed to wed and keep that marriage until your big day. Many people rush flashy, white, weddings whereas hearts were not given a chance to tie a knot on the outset.

Hearts in love wedding have two witnesses, that is, you and your love partner. You would watch them bind each other in love when you fall in love for the first time. This is the first marriage that holds water and should be respected. I am not against those general ceremonial marriages because I am married but such marriages are cruel and not romantic. It’s all about laws, prescripts and demands. There would a time where a priest say, “You may kiss the bride or love one another until death do you apart.” Such words are directive with no element of romance.

I wish marriages can be eliminated and allow hearts in love to wed by self-commitment I think divorce rate would be minimised as well. Wedding should rather bless love relationship between the man and female in love. When love relationship is blessed, there would no frigid religious or home affairs commitment. It’s a blessing ceremony that would hosted by a priest, thereafter people eat and disperse.

Your romantic constitution should keep third person at bay:

Honesty, I don’t like a third person into a love relationship of the two people. You were not there when they first met and impressed at each other, therefore buzz off! Do not allow a third person to poke his nose into your love affair. Do not seek his advises when you have challenges with your love affair because you would be inviting him exacerbate those challenges. Sit down with your love partner only and resolve your issues amicably. If he understands what love is, forgiveness would easy and meaning.

It is true that love affair you shared between the two of connects many people. I am talking about the members of your family. It is very common to find certain parents become hands on to the love affairs between their children to steer it to their directions of choice. Parents of certain cultures allow their children to take matters on their own once they are over twenty one years of old. That person is an adult to make some valid choices about his life in terms of love relationship, work wise etc. He cannot depend on his parent anymore. Those people, they have high numbers of successful love relationships.

There are some parents of certain cultures that still maintain an umbilical cord to their children as long they live. They control almost everything about their children despite being old enough to manage – their issues themselves.

Those parents control love relationship between their children as they please. Most of those love relationship they do not last longer, they halt along the way. This is common with my culture of black community. History of my culture has revealed that most of women in the olden days would listen to their parents to go and marry men that have many cows. Now, I am thinking about personal choices of those women to marry men they would love, were disregarded because of cows.

Such habits are still practiced nowadays where parents would force their daughters to marry a rich man. That’s not love – that’s a business so to speak. Get involved with somebody out of something, does not constitute love. Those parents are committing human trafficking silently to sell their daughter to somebody who is rich.

When a daughter came with her new boyfriend to be introduced – to her family during supper, a first question that her parents would ask – would be about what he is doing for a living. If that boyfriend is not working, disgruntlement would hang in the atmosphere around the table. There are some many good and healthy love affairs that some parents could not approve because they were not happy about them, while their children were happy – about them.

Babysitting your children even he is an adult, makes him cannot stand by his own decision when comes to love relationships, he would cook and empty many pots throughout his life without being stable with one person.

“My son is educated, he holds honours degree on psychology, and he needs a wife of the same value, not a skunk.”  Sometimes life is vice versa, those who hold high level of educations and careers lack some basics and being grounded. Those who hold low level of education and careers possess qualities and basics. Our forehead neither labelled careers nor education when a heart begins to love somebody. Do not ask her boyfriend that what he is doing for a living, rather ask him how much he loves your daughter.

Beating your woman creates a hell in your relationship:

This is a bible of love to live in heaven like me. Creating your heaven in your love affair is much possible. Heaven is beautiful; its floors are made of ceramic tiles. Angels are moving up and down to ascertain that a place is ever hygienic and purified. The smell of sweet fragrances from roses fumigates your presence. This place is blessed, sit back, relax and enjoy your heaven of love.

Respect all the teaching of your bible you compiled together in love. Beating your wife is against the bible of love, cheating is against the prescript of love, talk bad about your love partner is not line with the commandments of love.

Do not create hell in your love relationship. Hell is a scary place where anyone does not wish to live there. People who live in hell, you don’t ask them, you can tell by their scalded body. Don’t allow your wife to live in hell while she is still alive.

There are some many people who wish they could not even dare to enter such burning love relationship. They want to come out as soon as possible. I always say, if it is possible to escape a furnace that roast you alive, just get out before your life is over.

The hell of cheating is creating a furnace to burn partners in love alive. Everyday your home is blazing with a fire. Your bed becomes a braying stand, where you cannot sleep, beads of perspirations mixed with tears wet up your bed drenched. You are trying to find some answers, why is he cheating on you? Why do you deserve such excruciating ordeal? Those questions make you toss and turn at night. That is a living hell.

Beating your woman creates a hell in your relationship. There is only one way to show your strength and power: love making. Exert your entire prowess when you are making love to your woman. Don’t waste that energy by beating me; you would need it when making love. You won’t dare even to raise a finger after an energetic sex session, when you lay defenceless next to my body. Yes, that’s where anger and fuming are proved whether are existing or not. Women are beaten by making love to them, not a rape but romantic love making.

There is no pleasure in hell. When you are trying to eat nice food, it becomes hot stones that are painful to swallow them. Sweet sugar becomes bitter. Love making becomes a rape. A kiss by your husband, is like you kissed by a ghost because it makes your lips dry as in winter season.

Love making where there is no heavenly love becomes a sham. It makes two love partners sleep side by side afterwards with no hold and kissing. A hooker only that can be ejaculated without holding and kissing because you would be satiating a crave only where there is no love.  A love partner that you chose from the many people, you hold her close and kiss – her after love making. Waking up to sit in the lounge after love making and watch a television depicts no love.

Do you clean your woman your semen after love making or you just leave to her own device to clean her up. My husband cleans me and I am not ashamed to say so. Some men clean themselves only after love making and head up to the balcony to get a fresh air, while the onus left with their women to clean themselves.

Heavenly love allows a man to clean her woman up after love making. He holds and kisses her no matter an eager to do sex has been subsided from his feelings. Yes, it’s true, some men hold and kiss their love women when a feeling to make love is very live in their bodily system, when a craving is satiated, they disappear into thin air. They are nowhere to be found to kiss, hold and clean up their women. Walking all the way to the bathroom to get a towel by myself, is unfair while I am dripping and messing up the floor as well, be a gentleman, clean up your woman.

In heavenly love, a man takes off his women’s clothing before sex and put them back afterwards. When a feeling to make love pounce on you, you would use your teeth to remove my underwears, when you are satiated, you would not dare to replace them, they remain on the floor until I put on myself.

Love making was made to add a special interest when two people are in love. It was made renew love relationship that is starting to dwindle.  Love making makes two people become close to find many reasons to love one another so dearly. It was made to eradicate any differences between the two love partners to get back to love again.

Jesus was sent to earth to be an example for a human being to copy on, to see the kingdom of heaven. Sex as Jesus, was made to encourage love in our hearts when we hold and call each other with sweet words. You would agree with me, sex makes the two of you to be deeply in love. That romantic love making patterns should not stop. That holding and smooching when you are about to make love set an example like Jesus the way you should love one another.

You won’t scold and beat your woman during love making. You would call each other with lovely words. Onus is upon you to continue to call each other with such words when sex is not even there. You cannot do sex every second to maintain that sweet romantic spirit. Sex is performed during certain intervals but do you call each other with those sweet words if you are not doing sex. Some people call each other, Darling, Dear, Honey etc. during lovemaking, otherwise they look each other as ordinary people.

Such issues should be included to the romantic prescripts that two partners in love should not be forced to follow but do them spontaneously in the name of love.

Do you fasten your lady’s shoe laces when she is pregnant? There are times where my tummy is colossal like a ball. It would make me cannot even able to bent down and fasten my shoes. A sweet gentlemen is always by the side of her lady during these times when he becomes very lovingly and instrumental.

Paint changes its colour:

It is very easy to see a beautiful lady or handsome gentleman, and wish you can fall in love with him or her. You would notice a beautiful lady at church, university, work, etc., and become impressed. When your heart is captivated by the person you saw, it pushes you around that apple of your eye to make some advances to the lady of your choice. Yes, men possess that right to choose what would be their soul mates.

Woman possesses a good listening skills; she listens to your words when you are trying to win her heart.  If she is impressed by you, she submits to your words that constantly enticing her heart. In the love relationship you buy a paint knowing that its colour is white in the container, but as the time moves on, it changes its colour to blue.

Why love doesn’t remain stable forever? Why those first impressions do not last forever? Why that lady you chose does not remain your apple of your eye for as long you live?

I wish if men want to start a relationship, should leave out beautiful face and gorgeous structure of a woman’s body. I regret a man that fell in love with a certain lady, out of a beautiful face and sexy body structures. It is very painful to know that you are being loved, whereas a man is drawn to you by your hips and beautifulness of my face. Once he makes you pregnant, your body would be covered by stretch marks after delivering a baby, your hips becomes weak, and what happens next: he flies away.

Men should know that woman’s body tends to age more quickly than one of a man. I cannot stay beautiful and sexy forever. If I am pregnant, it is very common that my body won’t look the same. Such changes on my body, examines you as my man deeply, that how much you love me. Yes, we met when my body was silky and smooth, we made love, I became pregnant, I delivered your baby, and then my body has changed dramatically, now your are tested that how much do you love me. Many men around world have failed this test dismally.

When your man is going through these tests, he sits alone, looks down, and would not figure out what wrong with him. You would ask him:

“Darling, are you alright?”


“Why are you sitting alone?”

“I am tired, these days I really toil at work, and I need to sleep.”

“I am worried about you, darling, you have changed dramatically…”

“What change? I told you that I am tired…., If you may excuse me, I need to rest.”

“I have prepared you a supper…., don’t you want to eat before you sleep?”

“I am fine, I ate a pie on my way home….” he then shut a door on you.

Paint has changed its colour before your eyes. Your hips are weak, bums are covered with stretch marks, breasts are dangling, and he is very disgusted. He is no longer kissing you, He is no longer treats you in a special way, like before. He is no longer calling you at work, He is no longer responding to your text message that  wishing him a nice day, and he is about to leave you for good.

I regret women who are well built, I mean gorgeous women. I cry for those women who have beautiful legs and bulging hips because they are the preys of hawks. Light complexion women in my culture, they are hardly get married; they are seen as people to have sex with them without committing to her. Men who marry those women, they are always restless because every man wants to lie on top of those white, beautiful, legs. Yes, it’s true. Thanks God I am dark and I am married. We are black, but you also find some black people with very beautiful light complexion, not albinos. Those women, they hardly get married, because they are much beautiful.

Men, if you want a peace of mind, do not marry a beautiful woman, if she is beautiful and you wish to marry her, find out some other facts behind her beauty. Is she wise? You do not win a beauty pageant only by cute looks, there would be some general questions to be asked, if you answered them correctly, you win.

For every successful man in the world, there is a wise woman behind that man. You have been working so hard to have your house, cars, and good savings in your bank, you enjoy life being single. Time comes to have your love partner, you meet a beautiful lady, and she becomes your soul mate. She then reaps you off because her intention was to get near you to benefit from what you have. You would realise later that this was not love but fraud when your cars, money, and house are gone.

Have you ever watched a movie called ‘Original Sin’ that stars, Angelina Jolie and AntanioBanderas. This movie, states clearly that there are some women, you cannot trust, women that are after something. Luis Vargas (Antonio Banderas), a wealthy Cuban businessman, sent a letter to Julia Russel (Angelina Jolie) to sail to his country to be his wife, although they have never met before.They relied on pictures they were sending for each other.

Julia indicated on her latter that she wanted a man that would be interested in a pretty face, she then deceived Luis by sending a picture of a plain woman, and Luis succumbed to a deception.

Luis also deceived Julia that he was a poor working man, instead of the rich coffee owner company.

Julia sailed from America to Cuba and got married to Luis Vargas as soon as she arrived. Luis added his wife to his company and personal bank accounts.

One day Luis almost fainted when he discovered that his wife disappeared with all of his fortune.

I believe Luis supposed to be alert when Julia indicated that; she wanted a man that is interested in a pretty face. I think he was lucky to be hinted about what was going to happen. There is no commitment to this relationship; it’s only a pretty face that matters.

I do not regret Luis because he was told that a lady was not interested much to get married; she was looking for a fun relationship. She sent a picture of a plain woman to Luis as a deceit plan to surprise him with her beauty. Luis was so elated to see such a beautiful lady in front of him; he then suddenly led her to the altar as soon as she lands offshore.

There is a mistake that is done by the men, that if they see a beautiful woman, they hasten everything up to lead such woman to the altar. Give yourself time to know each other, because paint changes its colour to your surprise and regret yourself afterwards.

I believe if Luis gave enough time to know Julia, he would not regret himself. He was foolishly captivated by her beauty and think she can be a good wife, judging her by – her beauty.

There are so many relationships that were broken because pretty and handsome face was a priority. When such beautifulness and handsomeness is gone, it has been great together, then, bye!

We are constructing a bible of love that rules that, you should not go for a pretty or handsome face if you want to start a love relationship. If she is pretty and you love her so much, discover if she has what it takes to be a grounded wife.

These days wedding are so expensive. Some love partners waste their money to spend on the lavishness weddings, while they lead beautiful and handsome faces to the altar. Some men lead sexy and bulging hips to the altar. Some other men lead hairy sexy legs to the altar, two years later the marriage is over. Why? – A beautiful face has been burnt, sexy and smooth legs have developed a chicken pox. He then disappears into thin air.

Chapter 32.

House of love:

Don’t allow love atmosphere to vanish from your heart. How you would notice such disappearance of love? If people love one another, it is very common that they end up not loving each other as before. My advice to you today is that; do not allow your love graph to slant downwards.

When you are starting new love relationship, love graph scaling would be sky rocketing but as the time goes on, it’s begin to cast its slope downwards.

No one wish to cohabit in a filthy room. When I see a paper on the floor, I pick it up, and dispose it off correctly. When the dishes are filthy, I wash them. I wash dirty laundry once they are soiled, etc. I do all these routine chores because I don’t want to live in a dirty place.

House cleaning capabilities should be also be used to maintain clean love relationship as well. Once you notice a dirt that is accumulating at your love affair, remove it before it’s too late. Don’t wait until it’s creating obstinate rust that cannot be easily removed.

Dirty linen of cheating should be washed clean. Filthy kitchen utensils of not appreciating one another, need hygienic clean up. You cannot use pot with some yesterday left overs to cook breakfast, dinner, and supper.

Food is cooked on top of the yesterday remnants because a head of the house insulted his wife yesterday and never apologized. Let’s remove such old remnants inside the pots and continue to cook fresh and tasty food.

Putting dirty dishes and accumulating in the sink while they are filthy, it would make the whole house smelly and unbearable.

Leaking roof of your house is when you speak behind the back of your love partner. If you backchat your husband or wife to your friends and colleagues at work, you should know that your roof is leaking. When your roof is leaking, it makes everything in the house drenched. You cannot seat on the coaches in the dining room because it’s wet.

Weather can become clear, but soaked sponges of your coaches, would make your house smelly. Fix up the roof of your house; put some new tiles and cement. Buy some new coaches and make your dining room look good again for the both of you to relax.

Dirty windows of your love affair, is to stop calling each other with those lovely words, i.e., ‘Honey, Dear, etc. When you are to peep through the window, you won’t see clearly because it’s dirty. If you are stressful, they say you should look at the trees through a window. It would be impossible to peep through that window if it’s dirty; therefore clean it up.

Your love relationship is dusty, you cannot see through your hearts. It’s very reviving to know that you are being loved. I reddens if my husband calls me, Love, Darling, Dear, Honey, Sugar, etc. It feels so good to be reminded that, you are being loved and you able to stand against all odds in life generally.

Life is challenging, but if you got a pillar of strength next to you, you become strong as a bull when you are reminded that you are being loved and appreciated.

I bet, you won’t allow cracks on the wall of your house. Beside that cracks spoil your house; they facilitate cold winds to enter into your house.

Quivering while in bed because of such cold winds, is uncalled for, fix your house. Some love partners are freezing in bed because they are cold; you opened some cracks and allowed a third person to take control over your love relationship. Your love affair is now steering to the wrong directions and it’s on the verge to crash.

Do you love your house? I hope the answer is yes, so why are you not taking care of it? Roof on top of your head is important, so do your love relationship. Your relationship is important because it gives you some protection, love, joy, hope and happiness.

If you have been away and hungry, you would have some hopes that I would eventually get home to eat and rest.

Your love should be the one that bring some hopes, whenever thinking about it. Hunger in your stomach should be consoled by thought that you are going to eat variety of food in your relationship. You die if you are hungry and there is no hope of getting any food because there is none.

Hopes are the ones that make any person live. No hopes, no life. No matter what you are faced with, once you know that you have your pillar of strength by your side to share your setbacks – with, life becomes easy.

Christians believe in Jesus as father. They have hopes that whatever challenges they are facing, God intervenes and joke becomes easy. Healthy love relationship should be trusted as trusting God. No matter you can be shouted at work, but you would have some hopes that after work, you go home to experience joy in your love relationship.

You miss your bed, even you are far way, knowing that it has some clean blankets in a clean house as well. You would have some hopes that once I get home, I would keep myself cosy after eating from clean utensils as well. That is love relationship we need in our lives – that is clean and hygienic.

You should work together to maintain your house. If your wife is cooking, you should wash the dishes. If your wife or girlfriend is cleaning windows, you should polish the floor. When your wife or girlfriend is cooking while you read a paper in the couch, it does not show any helping hand at each other – at home.

Helping each other to maintain your house; depicts a good example as to how you should maintain your love relationship as well. Spot any dirt at your coffee table and clean it once and for all. When you notice that your dishes are filthy, take first initiative to clean them immaculately. Do not wait for your love partner to take first initiative, cease an opportunity to clean them as soon as you notice that they are dirty.

When you are no longer able to tell your wife if she does not look good in her new red dress, chase away that demon. Tell her that a dress does not fit her well; she should get another one before – she steps out of the door.

Well-built house looks good, boasting with its strong foundation. Strong foundation of your love relationship is not laid by marriage but is – laid by two hearts that are bitten in love immensely.

Strong foundation of love relationship is also laid by the unconditional love. If you love your wife because she is beautiful, once her face is burnt beyond recognition, you would run away from her. Such love is mediocre. True love stays despite any conditions because loving a person goes beyond beautifulness and handsomeness.

Strong foundation of your love relationship is laid by being honest to your love partner. Lying in the love relationship creates some cracks on your wall of love. You would mend your wall, but it starts all over to crack again because of lies. A call would come through your mobile phone, and you would deceive your wife and say, it’s from work, you are on call away, whereas it’s a call from your new girlfriend. That’s a lie – that weakens your relationship through a crack – that would demolish your house to the ground.

A house with strong foundation is capable to stand various harshest weather conditions. Heavy winds and rains fail to sweep away your house. You sleep unworried; you would be told in the morning that, there was a heavy storm last night. You sleep peaceful because you trust firmness of your house.

It is important to make your love relationship, strong. You don’t have to worry about anything. Storm of gossipers, it have no power at your relationship. Storm of being sacked from your job, doesn’t change anything into your love relationship. Storm of being involved in the car accident that left both legs amputated, it does not influence a way you have been loving your husband. Continue to give him all love he deserves.

Storm of your family that do not approve your love relationship, it does not has any impact between the two of you, it gets into other ear, it comes out to another one. You love each other, what’s the matter?

Chapter 33.

Affluence and love:

Some men and women, fall in love for the various reasons. Love was meant to start families. Genesis 1:28 says, God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. God blessed them; and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”

You cannot be fruitful and multiply if there is no love in the outset, this is the reason I say love was meant to begin families. It is true that some people have changed the focus of love. We now find some people fall in love for certain reasons. Some people fall in love for money, some other people fall in love to entertain themselves sexually. A truth is that, love was made to start families not for any reasons as per Genesis 1:28

Arrival of money in the world has changed many things in terms of love relationships. Yes, money is part of our lives to procure those wants and needs for the survival of – our bodies but it cannot use to buy love.

There was a song by Black Street titled, ‘Money can’t buy me love.’ This song speaks a high volume that money is not a fishing rod for love.

Some people do not sit and have a conversation with their hearts to find their lifetime soul mates. When they get a lot of money, they think their problems are solved. If you are a gentleman and can’t win beautiful girls because they are not impressed by your face, you would begin to win them by money you got in your pocket. Such love depends on the water supply of money that doesn’t stop. When that river dries up, love is gone as well.

There are some women that would do whatever it takes to keep their love relationship live as always between them and their counterpart men. Some women renovate houses of their boyfriends’ mothers to keep love going while those women’s mother live in the bad condition houses. Some women do buy some expensive cars for their boyfriends just to impress them and to keep love light shining as ever. Believe me or not, that is a wrong direction to cultivate love in your relationship. It would be the waste of your time and money when he would have to tell you – to buzz off.

Some men tend to target more affluent women to get special treatment. When things get awry in their relationship, they manage to get away with their socks and boots only when love is gone. Such love relationship is very disappointing and it does prove a point that money can’t buy love.

Spoiling your girlfriend by taking her to some vacation at the whole world, should be the activity you do in your life style but not to buy love. Do not ever try to put a joke around your neck that you would not manage, one would forgive himself to say, ‘She used up my money but – she made off with a wound.’ Because he did whatever it takes just to make love with her and he wouldn’t have made love with her if he had not spent his fortune on – her.

It’s very important to eat and light up your home in the evening but that money to buy food and electricity should not direct your love relationship. When money runs relationship at home, it makes a man or woman to list boastful what he/she is capable to do in the house. ‘I bought a fridge, microwave, coaches, beds, cupboards etc.’ what have you done so far? Nothing! She or he would bring that to your attention, thereafter those coaches would burn you if – you ever try to sit on them.

It is very important to use your money for the good course and be patient up until you get your lover of your life who won’t exploit your resources for mere nothing.

When your boyfriend is fed up, he would leave you despite your special treatment towards him. You buy him presents on his birthday but he forgets yours. You buy him some expensive clothes but he hardly take you out even to the movies or clubs. He seemingly doesn’t care much about you, so why are so – much into him? You try by all means to keep a wheel rolling in the expense of your resources whereas he would find it easy to leave you without a shame.

An outcome of love that is affluence oriented is very hurtful and disappointing. Some men target affluent women to abuse their resources. Most of the time people who are not your choice when comes to love relationship, are the one who have a lot of money. He or she is not your type but because he or she is rich, you plead to fall in love with him or her.

I know a certain guy who was very handsome and he went for a simple lady because she was a doctor. He would misuse her car and use it to walk his mischievous ways to see another girlfriends of his.

This guy would take various clothing accounts cards that belong to his lady and swipe them for other people who are coming to buy clothes in the exchange of cash that he would spend on booze.

It means that if you buy two pairs of jeans, he would collect physical cash from you and go and swipe using such accounts cards whenever he need some cash. Money makes the world go round, I agree but it should not be used to buy love. Let’s use money for the good purposes. When you go to the shop to buy a packet of teabags, milk, and sugar, you would go home and enjoy a sweet and milky tea. If you drink that tea more often, you would use up your sugar, teabags, and sugar. Such ingredients become depleted because you bought them.

I am trying to shed a light that if you buy love, it would become depleted as well. Everything we buy tends to get finish with time but true love stays genuine and the same.

I just want to tell you that love for money is a lie and waste of your time. Invest your money at the Johannesburg Stock Exchange and property not in love. Money invested with legal financial institution, bears you an interest but money invested at fun love relationship, goes down the drain.

Our culture stipulates that if you a man and love your woman, pay lobola. Yes, not all women want to settle down. If she wants to eat up your money, leave her and get someone who would appreciate to be paid lobola and settle down, this is the legit way to spend your money for the good course. Yeah! this is our Zulu culture to pay lobola and have a wife.

In Zulu culture, a man is well recognized among other men, if he has a wife that he paid lobola for her. Some other men buy for their girlfriends expensive material things that even exceed an amount that would be paid for lobola.

I am scared if money love is over, special treatment vanishes into thin air. Money love poles are always shaken by the tests of times in life because it was not made on the pure strong foundation of love. Tests like a pair of scissors, they can just snap off those tiers of money love with an ease when he is getting enough of you.

Human mind tends to be deceived easily. I am saying this because that woman, who has been treated like a queen, won’t settle for less once such money love is over. She always target more affluent men to maintain her standards very high, she would never lower hear gears. Money always encourages fun relationships. When she is for fun, then someone out there should be ready to play and being capable to amuse her as well. If you do not have money, you should get off from her way.

Such women who have been living like Queen Elizabeth, they put heavy pressure onto the new men in their lives despite – their financial muscles. Such women expect the same special treatment as from their exes. A man who intends a serious relationship with her but do not have a strong financial muscle, he would find it hard to keep her. She is really moving on a fast lane. If you fail to pick up her pace, you need to return on the slow lane.

Her speed is very high that she cannot even notice some potholes and bends. Her rims get bended and she overturns each an every corner of the road.  A car that always gets dented and straightens up at the workshop becomes useless over the time and it is finally used to transport garbage to be disposed off.

When she is wreckage, she would begin to look for a serious relationship, where it would be nowhere to be found. No young and handsome man wishes to settle down with wreckage, she would then relegate herself towards grannies while she is in her 20’s or 30’s. She would be the first to know how diabetic and high blood pressure are prescribed when her husband needs some care.

Money causes a pride to a person, when she was full of herself, cannot even respond when greeted by the people who know her. She then becomes a laughing stock among her acquaintances, when a special treatment vanishes. You would hear them saying, ‘is just like her…Oh! No! I can’t believe what I see.’

A person who categorized love relationship under fun love relationship and serious love relationship, messed up a great deal. Fun love relationship has killed the world. Fun love relationship has left millionaires and billionaires of the world bankrupt. If I had a world, I would have a world of love where there is no fun love relationship. Complexities in love relationship do not call for fun because an outcome of such relationship is not amusing.

Is it still a fun if your boyfriend leaves you while pregnant? When you make love, your body responds to hormones in many ways. Some people develop stretch marks all over the body. Is it still fun love relationship? Some people are infected with venereal diseases. Is still fun love relationship? No! I don’t think so; there is no fun love relationship.

Love relationship was meant to be serious and respected. Fun love relationship goes together with affluence. No affluence no love.

Chapter 34.

War of in-laws:

Men should take into consideration that women do not get along at each other. There is a fierce competition that exists between women. Most of war they fight is emanating from envy. If a women notices another woman’s hairstyle that is awesome than her, she would become envious and she would also try by all means to overdo that woman’s hairstyle.

They compete about shoes, dresses, cars, houses etc. This competition between women never ends and men should know about it. Such competition continues to exist even between wives and mother in-laws. War between wives and mothers in-law – and sisters in-law is very perilous to your love relationship.

I strongly believe that when love is ignited between a man and woman, it must bonds two heart that are bitten in love and it should also convey the spirit of love between the two families of that man and woman in love. If your love relationship leaves a trail of enmity between your families, that relationship is destined to shatter.

There was a married couple and it happened other day that they had to visit their in-laws interchangeable. They started with one of a wife. This couple they had two cars; private car, and a van. They had to go to the shopping centre to buy some groceries and a wife suggested that a van should be driven. They took a van and they went to the shopping centre and buy some groceries.

A wife suggested a certain shopping supermarket that is expensive because of its respected brand name. She picked up all delicious and tasty foods. A van became full to its capacity and they left. A wife’s mother was much exited when they got home and they spent a weekend.

One day they planned to visit a man’s mother and the rest of the family. A man’s wife suggested that a private car should be used. A man asked his wife why a small car should be used, she said a small car would run faster than a van because she needs to come back to do some laundry and help children with some homework.

They took a small car and proceeded to the shopping centre. When they got there, a man’s wife suggested a low profile shopping supermarket. Her man asked why she was choosing such supermarket; she said there was a sale and they cannot buy from the previous supermarket because food prices peaked.

She picked meagre groceries of mediocre quality and they put inside a car boot, they then left. A man’s mother was happy to see them and she also became sad when they could not spent even five hours at and they then left.

Ephesian chapter 5:31 says, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” It does not mean a man and woman in love should abuse their parents. Your mothers and fathers should not be forgotten – and they should be treated equally.

When you are getting married, you then become a prince and princes of the nation of the two families that came together in the name of love – that was started by you.

Your capabilities to lead should be seen when these two families are always happy. When they are happy, your relationship would be blessed. Tears of your parents when you mistreat them create misfortune for you.

There is a problem about last born at home; they are baby sitted even into their love relationship. The man’s sisters and mother are the ones who run their love relationship. His wife does not have a say at any matters that concerns her husband and their marriage.

Most of those last born men, they fail to see their wives plight because they enjoy being baby sitted until they lose their wives. If you are a man while you have brothers and sisters – and being married, you might be ready to fight the First World War.

The First World War you fight would be the natural competition between women if your wife lives with your sisters and mother. If you resolve to build your own home, it would be like you are deserting your family and a fight of ownership begins. Your mother says, “He is my son”, your sisters say, “He is our brother” and finally your wife says, “He is my husband, I own him.”

It becomes very difficult if a married man and woman were the only breadwinners of their families if they have to leave their homes to start theirs. A fight about who owns who becomes fierce to the detrimental of your marriage.

I mentioned earlier on that if you are married, you become a king and queen of the nation of two families. Be the good kings and queens of your kingdom. Running away from the challenges of your nation created, would be translated to the detrimental of love relationship kingdom.

A king is a king because of people, if people are fighting, its kingdom becomes frail. If your families are not together when you are married, your love relationship would not survive.

Chapter 35.

Love letters:



Chapter 36.

Chapter 37.


Chapter 38.

Chapter 39 

Chapter 40.

Chapter 41.

Chapter 42.

Chapter 43.

Chapter 44.

Chapter 45.